I’m 40 and I’ve Just Discovered My Husband Has Been Hiding Money from Me

Im forty, and Ive just discovered that my husbands been hiding money from me.
Until recently, I believed we were a team. Shared finances. Shared bills. Shared dreams. I work in an office, he runs a small business. Were not well off, but weve never gone hungry. At least, thats what I thought.
At first, I brushed off the little signs.
He started paying for things in cash.
Hed avoid any conversations about his income.
He kept saying, Its a slow month. Over and over.
Everything came to a head in our kitchen. I was looking for the washing machine warranty in the drawer where we keep all the paperwork. Instead, I came across an envelope. Thick. Held together with an elastic band.
Insidewads of notes.
I had to sit down. My fingers tingled with shock.
When he arrived home, I left the envelope sitting on the table.
Whats this?
Where did you get that?
From our drawerwhere we keep everything.
Thats business money.
In our kitchen?
Dont you trust me?
Do you trust me?
We sat in silence.
Only the hum of the fridge filled the air.
Im saving, he finally admitted.
For what?
For emergencies.
What sort of emergencies?
In case things dont work out between us.
I went cold.
Since that day, nothings been the same. I still cook. We still sit down at the table. But now I countevery purchase, every word, every time he says, We cant afford it.
He insists hes just being practical.
I dont want to end up with nothing, he says.
And what does that make me? I ask.
Please, dont start again.
I never started.
My hands shake when I pay the bills. I wonder if Im the risk. If he already has one foot out the door. If the moneys for his new life without me.
If I press to put the savings in a joint account, Ill seem greedy.
If I stay silent, I accept that we doesnt really exist.
If I start my own secret stash, we become flatmates.
If I dont, I stay naive.
Last night, he locked the drawer.
For the first time.
Tell me is it normal in marriage to have a secret plan B? Or is this the end of trust?