You really have no sense of responsibility. Cant you see how badly Matthew is faring? Hes your brotheryou could have stepped in. All you ever think about is yourself, my mother had scolded me.
A short while before that, shed called, asking me to collect all my belongings from her flat.
You cant even move about here any more because of your stuff, shed said.
The argument had erupted after I refused to hand over any cash to my brother, Matthew, for the deposit on a new flat. I wasnt offering a loan; I knew full well hed never pay it back.
When I turned him down, Matthew stormed out of my flat, furious. He was convinced I would simply hand over my savings, using the excuse that he had a wife and children, whereas I did not.
I feel I must speak of it, for my family has treated me unfairly, especially as the holidays draw near.
When I moved to Manchester for university, I immediately took a parttime job. At first I lived in halls of residence, then I rented a flat with a friend. I didnt want to lean on my parents, so I made ends meet and sent help to my mother whenever I could.
She never accepted money outright; instead she kept asking me to bring back useful thingsclothes, shoes, household items. And whenever I visited, Id arrive with bags full of groceries.
My mother lives in a threebedroom council flat with Matthew. Our father passed away three years ago.
Matthew never cared much for education. After leaving school he went to work in the Netherlands, and the only thing he managed to buy there was an old car. Back in England he took up a job as a taxi driver.
Later he married, moving into my mothers flat with his wife, Rosie. They have always struggled financially, living handtomouth. The moment their wages hit the bank, they spend it all.
Both my mother and Rosies parents chipped in regularly, so Matthew grew accustomed to a safety net. He never bothered to earn more or improve his situation, knowing there would always be someone to bail him out.
Now Matthew and Rosie have two children, with a third on the way. They decided the flat was getting too cramped and began looking into buying their own house.
As for me, I live with my partner, Thomas, in a rented flat. We plan to marry, though weve postponed the ceremony until a more suitable time. Our incomes are steadyThomas works as a software engineer, and I run several online shops. We avoid frivolous spending and are saving for a mortgage so we can live independently after the wedding.
My mother knew about our plans, yet she hinted to Matthew that he could ask me for help.
They want to buy a house but have no cash for a deposit, she told me.
When Matthew came over and asked outright for money, I refused. He flew into a rage, believing I owed him simply because he had a family and I did not.
Later my mother called again, her voice sharp:
You really have no conscience. Cant you see how hard it is for Matthew? Hes your brotheryou could have helped. All you ever think about is yourself.
She added, Come collect your things from our flat. We cant move around because of your mess. Dont even think of coming for Christmas. Matthews angry with you, and I dont want to see you either.
I didnt argue. Ill gather my belongings and tuck them into our rented flat, and when Thomas and I finally buy our own house, Ill set them up there.
I could have lent Matthew the money, but I knew he would never repay it. He never even asked for a loan; he simply expected me to hand over all my savings because he has children.
How would you have acted in such a situation?
