“Well, then you’re a cleaner,” Mum said, and you could hear a hint of contempt in her tone. I just stayed quiet. Not because I had nothing to say, but because this time I decided to let it be. If she calls me a cleaner, then I’m a cleaner.
Think about it, really I wash the dishes, I clean the coffee machine, I make sure there’s sugar and tea in the break room, I keep the tea bags from piling up and the rubbish from overflowing. I dont mop the floors or scrub the toilets, but does that change the gist of it? For Mum, absolutely not. Shes got this idea stuck in her head: if you tidy up, youre a cleaner. End of story.
Honestly, if I hadnt moved to Canada, I probably would still feel that little internal ick about the job an unconscious, persistent disgust. Its something Ive carried since I was a kid: the notion that cleaning is undignified, that educated people dont do that. It was only when I found myself in a completely different system that the pieces started to fall into place.
One day it clicked: sure, I can be a cleaner, and at the same time a person with two university degrees, with a consultancy that used to fetch £115 an hour. In this new reality I dont speak the language fluently, but I understand cleaning, and thats become my bridge.
I still remember my mentor saying, Feel it its a feminine thing, grounding, not something to be ashamed of. It hit home. At home I never feel embarrassed when I dust the shelves or load the dishwasher. So why should it suddenly be a source of shame once Im out of the house?
What surprised me most is how its treated here. In Canada the boss actually greets the cleaner, asks how shes doing, sits down to have lunch together, inquires about her family back in England, and compliments the spotless kitchen. And Im standing there thinking, Thats respect, no judgment attached.
I dont feel shortchanged. I feel like Im at the beginning of a fresh path, and that gives me strength. Theres also a quiet pride swelling inside me. Because, after all, if it werent for me, who would hand you that clean mug for your cappuccino?
