Gran inflicted as much hurt on our dad as she could, and we always ended up wounded by it too.
Whenever my brother and I were left alone with Granwhen we stayed over at weekends or spent parts of the summer at her cottagewed hear endless gossip about her neighbours, stories of her wild youth, or complaints about our useless father. According to Gran, Dad had never been the same.
Hes not even forty and already balding! That belly of his keeps getting bigger every year. How do you even look at him? Heaven forbid you end up looking like that!
But it wasnt just his appearance that bothered her. Gran loathed that Dad worked such long hours, that he wouldnt let us or Mum do just whatever we pleased. We didnt spend our holidays at Bournemouth every year, and to her, that meant Dad wasnt a proper family man. Mum, on the other hand, who only worked some of the time and spent ages on those baffling evening courses, never did anything wrong in Grans eyes. Dad always had to fork out for it, though. Yet this wasnt about Mumit was always about Dad.
I can honestly say Dad is a wonderful father. We have everything we need, we live comfortably, and although Grans anger towards him always feels vague, its constant. Im sixteen now, and I understand exactly what shes going on about; but my brother George is only eight, and to him, Grans words come through loud and clear. I do worry. Might her sharp tongue one day turn my brother against our dad?
Whats there to love? shed sneer. Your father didnt so much as lift a finger to buy the flat you live in. If your grandfather and I hadnt helped, youd all be renting some poky little place. You ought to be grateful weve supported you! Then shed lower her voice and add, And what about your fathers side? Divorced, both of them. Off starting new families in Kent or God knows where. Im the only grandmother you’ve got who cares enough to have you stay.
Dads put up with Grans accusations far more than once. But ever since we were little, George and I would always go to him afterwards, to comfort himand we still do. No matter how hard Gran tries to chip away at Dads confidence or diminish him in our eyes, George and I have always stood by him. These days, when were given the option to visit her, wed rather stay home. Gran is perpetually offended and rings Mum to complain about us, never understanding that the more she hurts our dad, the more she hurts us too.
I truly dont know if shell ever see that by wounding Dad, she wounds us as well.
