I honestly cant understand how I made such a mistake. After our divorce, my ex-husband behaved dreadfully. Together with his mother, he took nearly everything from the flatdown to the curtains.
Nobody cared that their son and grandson still lived in the flat. Now, when things arent going well for them, they demand that I give up the child support payments, accusing me of being petty.
Theres not much to say about my married lifeits a story as old as time. We fell in love, went on dates, got married. I was a bit embarrassed that my husband was stingy, but my mum assured me it was a good trait, that hed never waste money unnecessarily, unlike my father whose pockets were always empty.
Had I not been twenty-one and so naïve, Id probably have realised not to marry a man who was counting pennies when it came to me even before our wedding. But I listened to Mum, let myself be wooed, gave in to emotion, and married him.
Thankfully, I had my own flat, so thats where we lived. Naturally, my husband turned his nose up at the studio flat, saying it wasnt a proper home, but accepted it for now. He insisted we should save for a bigger place, and once we saved enough, sell my flat and buy a new one together. Luckily, that never happened, else Id have sold my property.
We managed alright for about a year, though my husband kept telling me I was wasting money. For me, buying washing-up liquid that cost £2 more than usual hardly counted as squander, but my husband lectured me, saying wed never afford another flat unless I learned to be thrifty.
Then I found out I was pregnant, and suddenly my husband took over all the finances. He claimed hormones would make me impulsive and wasteful, so it was best he managed everything. What could I say?
It was a miserable time. I had to justify every item I wanted or neededit felt worse than defending a thesis. He started keeping tabs on how quickly shampoo, soap, milk, sausages, and even toilet roll disappeared. I was expected to explain why toilet paper didnt last.
My mum and mother-in-law were hopeless. One said I was overreacting, the other agreed with her son. I wasnt earning, so my husband was the sole provider and had to make sure we could afford everything.
I lived in that penny-pinching mode for a year and a half, but eventually I couldnt take it anymore and filed for divorce. I was tired of begging for toilet paper, laundry powder, and hearing constant complaints that my husband worked hard while I spent his earnings.
After the divorce, my husband and his mother took nearly all the furniture, even the childs cot because theyd bought it. Where our son would sleep was no longer their concern. I still remember my mother-in-law folding curtains, packing slippers, and counting spoons and forks. It felt surreal, as if I were hallucinating.
The one good thing about my ex was that he worked and drew a decent salary, always kept everything legal, and aimed for a high pension. So, I applied for child support and received everything my son was entitled to.
I got through my maternity leave, put my son in nursery, and found a job. Three years later, I remarried. My current husband is wonderful. He gets on well with my son, talks with my mum, and is simply amazing. Most importantly, he isnt tight-fisted. We have enough money to live comfortably without worrying about price tags.
My ex, who vanished after our divorce and never contacted our sonapart from paying child supportapparently kept an eye on me, knew I had remarried, and saw I was happy.
Turns out, he’s not doing so well. He married again, and soon hell have another child. Paying support is tough for him. Its obvious the amount will decrease once his new baby arrives, but he thinks thats not enoughhe wants me to drop child support altogether. He says I have everything: I live in my husbands flat, rent out mine, we both have good jobs. Why would I need child support?
I dont need the money for myself, but it belongs to my son. Im saving it in his account. Why should my child lose out just because his father decided to start another family?
My ex pleaded with me to show understanding, tried to play on my sympathy, but the memory of him carrying out our sons cot after the divorcewithout a hint of pitywas fresh. I told him I wont give up child support, and if he stops paying, Ill take it to the bailiffs.
