– Excuse me, Mr. Thompson, Im really sorry, but do you mind if I leave a bit early today? My daughter isnt well.
Mary placed tomorrows meeting schedule and a stack of prepared paperwork on her bosss desk. There was still an hour to go before the end of the workday, but the school nurse had already called twice, and she decided to risk asking for time off. Shed only joined the construction firm recentlya stroke of luck, really, considering she had neither secretarial experience nor, lets be honest, the presentation skills listed in the job ad. She remembered rolling her eyes at her reflection before the interview:
– Well then, Mary, no doubt they’re not talking about you.
Her cardigan, lovingly preserved, was hanging on, but her skirt was looking worse for wearone her mother made herself, painstakingly picking the fabric and sewing for days, steeling herself before every new seam.
– Itll be just as good as one from the shops.
– Mum, its handmade! Course its better. Mary stretched the truth a little, but she knew how much those words meant to her mother.
There wasnt extra cash floating around in their family. Mary remembered when her dad was alive and having choices about clothes was easy. After he passed away, all that changed. Her mum, Lydia, was a nurse and made just enough to cover the basics. Somehow, they scraped by, until grandma fell ill. To say Lydias relationship with her mother-in-law wasnt smooth would be putting it mildly.
– Lydia! You have no sense of family. Mind you, with your background, Im not surprised. But youre part of our family now, so get used to the fact that family means responsibility.
Back then, Mary didnt really get what her grandma was on about. It sounded impressive, but soon she realised it was a one-way street. Lydia cared for her mother-in-law and handed over most of her pay, while grandma sat back and took it as her due, never giving a thought to helping out. The criticism and complaints poured down like rain.
– Mum, why do you just take it? Why dont you answer back? grown-up Mary asked, baffled, after another round of advice from her grandmother. Lydia rarely took her along to visit, but grandma insisted sometimes.
– Because, darling, I know she’s wrong. And I know shes sick and lonely. Apart from us, shes got no one. She fell out with her own sister, and her nephews want nothing to do with her. And I promised your father Id look after her. How could I break that promise?
Mary used to want to tell grandma exactly what she thought, but Lydia always gently stopped her, giving her that look.
– Why bother, Mary? Look, I dont take it personally. Let her talk. All that matters is that I know Ive done right and shes been cared for.
– But shes not struggling! Mary would mutter to herself, increasingly aware of how things really were.
She knew now her grandma wasnt some poor relative. She had a nice flat, another let out for a good sum, a tidy pension, and a decent bank account thanks to grandad. Grandma never went without.
– Why does she need your money, mum? Isnt she loaded? Mary fumed as they kept a careful eye on their income and expenses.
– Mary! Lydia would snap, tossing a tea towel onto the side.
– What?
– Let it go. Lydias tone softened. Dont turn out well, just dont. Be yourself, love. Dont fill yourself with all that darkness. Nothing good comes of it. And remembereverything grandma owns is hers, not ours. It never was and it likely never will be. Lydia would line up the washed cups with military precision. Mary could sense the effort it took her mother to keep composure. Dont even think of it as yours, not even secretly. Or itll eat you up.
Mary only understood what her mother meant when grandma passed away. The solicitors envelopewill and goodbye letterwas waiting in the bedside table. After reading it, Lydia let out a shaky sigh, crumpled the thin sheets of paper, and tossed them away.
– Come on.
– Where? Mary stared in confusion.
– Nothing for us here now. My promise is fulfilled.
Mary didnt ask any more questions. Later, she learned grandma had left everything to her nephews. Lydia never revealed what was in the letter, only muttering once, when pressed:
– She left it all to them because they were her blood. No more questions, Mary! You dont need this muck. Leave it behind.
– Did she really doubt I was her granddaughter? Mary couldnt stop herself eventually.
– No. Lydia sighed. She just said you were too much like me, not enough like your dad. An outsider.
– But am I? Am I like dad?
– Mary, youre the spitting image of your father, in looks and character. Ive never known a better man. So, take the good from this family and forget the bad. Leave it all in the past.
Mary decided not to argue. She didnt fully get her mum, but she could see how much this meant to her.
Life carried on. Mary finished school and went off to university. Thats when her mum sewed the infamous skirt. Mary wore it to exams, lectures, even her first job at the department. Thats where she met the future father of her daughter. The skirt was her lucky charm. So, naturally, its what she wore to her interview. Not much else was suitable. Jeans wouldnt do, after all.
She heard the recruiters giggle behind her back, but remembered Lydias advice and straightened up.
– No experience, a little one to look after where did you work before?
– University lecturer.
– And why the career change?
– Time to try something new. Mary forced a smile, but her knees were trembling. She was sure this would be another rejection.
But, surprisingly, it wasnt. The HR manager, after a few more questions, offered her a secretary position on probation. Mary didnt hear the whispers after she left the room.
– Whyd you pick her, Mrs. Harris? What does Mr. Thompson want with someone like her?
– Well, he likes smart women. Well see how it goes. Besides, a little polish, a smarter look and shell give you all a run for your money. Right, enough chitchatback to work!
Mary and Mr. Thompson got along well from day one. When he saw her reading the coffee machine manual instead of just poking at the buttons, he laughed:
– First woman Ive met who reads the instructions before diving in. Well get on just fine.
Her admin duties werent too hard. The boss liked to oversee everything, then realised Mary had a brilliant memory and a knack for finding anyone, arranging meetings to suit everyone, and rearranging them diplomatically when needed. She always had scheduling sorted. The only thing he could complain about were her occasional early departures when her daughter was sick.
– Mary, I understand, but this is becoming routine. Ill soon be without a secretary altogether. Mr. Thompson rubbed his temples.
– Headache? Want a paracetamol?
– No, Ill be alright. Thanks. Go on then, of courseyour daughter is the priority. But you really should think about a solution. Does she have a gran, an aunt, someone to help when shes ill?
– No one. Mary straightened her new jacket.
– No family at all?
– None. Mums gone. Theres no one left.
– Sorry to hear that. What about a childminder?
– I cant really afford that, not yet. But Ill look into it. Youre rightits my problem.
Mary nodded at him, left the office, and felt lower than ever. Her daughter, Anna, was waiting at school with a fever, and home just meant more chores. She wanted to scream. Why was it always so hard? Why was she alone?
She didnt need to hunt for an answer. She already knew. As her mother once said,
– Good people dont always cross our path, love. Sometimes you can count them on one hand. Thats why they matter. Dont let them slip by.
– And if they never come along?
– Oh, dont be daft. Youre a mathematicianwhat are the odds no good person crosses your path, eh? Exactly. Lydia laughed. Not everyones bad. Most are just busy with their own lives. Some open about it, some not. I hope you meet more of the latter.
Mary often wished shed listened to her mum when she met Annas dad. Young, talented, all fire and ambitioneverything Mary felt she herself lacked, James had in spades. Pity they never wanted the same things. Mary believed she could have both family and her science, but James had no such vision. He wasnt one for thinking about the future.
When he got a job offer overseas, he left without a second thought, a week after proposing to her.
– Cant we just wait a few years? No biggie.
– James, I cant wait. Im having a baby
Mary saw Jamess face change and knew that was the end.
– Does it have to be now? Cant it wait? James paced, not meeting her eye.
– No. Dont worry. Mary took her coat and headed for the door, turning before she left. Ill sort it out. Good luck, James.
She never saw him again.
Anna was born a month after Lydia passed awaya heart attack at work, surrounded by doctors, none of whom could save her. Mary saw her mum off holding back tears.
– Later, Mum. Ill cry later, after Annas here, okay?
But later, there was no time. Anna was small and frail, needing constant care. Mary went into autopilot mode: wash, clean, walk, feed, repeat. She left universitycouldnt face the whispers and the judgmental looks.
– Sorry, mumIm too sensitive. But I cant do it shed whisper to her mums photo after Anna was asleep. What did I do wrong? Had a baby? Didnt force James to marry me? Maybe I should have. At least I wouldnt get those looks. Youd say thats nonsense that I just need to keep moving forward. Well, Im trying, mum. Its not going well, but I am.
Once Anna was old enough for school, Mary signed her up straightaway. The first year was hardest. Anna was constantly off sick, and Mary stopped applying for better jobswho would hire someone who needed time off all the time? She worked evenings as a cleaner at a beauty salon, thinking the time would come when she could do something else.
These memories ran round and round her mind as she hurried to collect Anna. Once she had Anna and had picked up medicine on the way, they finally got home. She greeted her neighbour, Natalie, at the entryway.
– Evening, Natalie.
– Again? Natalie nodded at the feverish Anna, clinging to her.
– Afraid so. Thats twice this month. If she keeps this up, work will let me go. I thought she was over it, six months without a bug!
– Thats nothing! Mine didnt get sick for a year then suddenly it was every month. You should get a childminder, surely? Youre earning a bit better now, arent you?
– Not that much. Mary sighed, nudging Annas shoes off.
– True, minders arent cheap. More than I earn, sometimes! If only you had your mum.
– I know. Anyway, best get on.
Once inside, Mary nearly cried. Mum, I miss you so much
Anna was still enough to nap, so Mary got her settled, made her some hot tea, and began to trawl the local listings for sitters.
She nearly missed the soft knock at the door. Anna was asleep; the house was quiet. Who knocks, rather than rings? Mary crept to the door.
– Hello, Mary dear!
At the door stood Mrs. Green, an elderly neighbour from the next block. Mary didnt know her welljust polite hellos.
– Hello! Is everything alright? Mary asked, surprised.
– Well, yes and no. Are you going to invite me in, or shall we chat here on the doorstep?
– Sorry, come in!
Mrs. Green bustled inside, took off her shoes, and pointed at the kitchen.
– Kitchens through here?
– Yes, lets not wake your little one. Rest works wonders for sick kids.
Mary, still bewildered, followed her. Mrs. Green lowered herself into a chair, folded her hands in her lap, and looked Mary up and down:
– So, you need a granny-on-call, do you?
– What? Marys eyebrows shot up.
– A granny-on-call. I babysit for an hour or two here and there. When your youngsters ill or something crops up. There was a familiar kindness in her voice, one Mary hadnt heard since her own mother.
– I do need someone but Ive no idea where to start.
– No need to start. Im offering. Fancy taking me on as a sitter?
Mary hesitated. The offer was perfect, but she didnt really know this neighbour. Trusting her child so soon
– How did you even know I was looking for help?
– Oh, come now, not much of a secret! I ran into Natalie earlier; she mentioned it.
– I see Mrs. Green, please dont take this the wrong way…
– Dont fret. Ask anything you like. Youd be giving me your child to look after, after all! Ask away. Or if youd prefer, Ill just tell you about myself and you can decide after.
Mary looked her over, then decided. She put the kettle on, set out a tin of biscuits, and sat down opposite.
– Go on then, lets hear your story.
Mrs. Greens life was simple. Born and bred right here, parents worked in the factory. She did too, met her husband there, married, had two boys. Raised them, put them through school, saw them out into the world. Her husband died young. Her sons moved away for work when they left the army. She had a handful of grandchildren she hardly saw. Didnt need her helpdaughters-in-law had their own mums about. Now, even the grandkids had grown up. She missed out on enjoying little onesalways working, never got a chance to mind the grandkids. She never thought about being a sitter until Natalie suggested it. Why not fill that space, help someone? Maybe shed be useful, and itd cheer her up too. She said she wouldnt charge much. But Mary should take her time and let her know tomorrow.
Mary had no real choice she nodded, seeing her out, then sat up thinking about it all night.
– What do you think, Mum? Feels strange. I only thought about it, and here she was Is that a good sign?
Her mother, smiling out from the photo, didnt answer, but Mary weighed everything all night. In the morning, she knew her answer.
– Mrs. Green, hello? Id like you to do it.
That was the start of their partnershipas Mrs. Green called babysitting.
– Were colleagues, Mary. We both work, and it works out for us both. You can relax knowing Annas safe, and it gives me a bit extra to put away.
– Your boys help out?
– Oh yes! But I hardly take much from them. Only when Im ill. Theyve their own families. So long as I can, Id rather earn my share.
At first, Mary watched carefully as Mrs. Green settled in with Anna, but soon she relaxed. Anna took to Mrs. Green from the first day.
– Not feeling great, are you, poppet? She felt Annas forehead the first day. Never mind, Ill make you some tea with honey and tell you a long story. Youll drift right off, and I promise, the bugsll be gone in no time.
– But I havent any honey Mary said, uncertain.
– Ive brought some! When would you have time to jar honey when you can barely keep up? Right, off you go to work. Well be fine here.
Within a few months, Anna was reading fluently, and Mary was stunned.
– Shes only five! How have you taught her to read already?
– Shes just clever, love. She loves her draughts and chess, too. You should let her join a club. I could take her.
Soon, Anna was swimming twice a week and playing chess regularly.
– I could never have managed all that on my ownthe time alone! When would I fit it in? Mary told Natalie. I cant thank you enough.
– Thank me? Natalie waved her off. Wait until my Chloes biggerIll pinch Mrs. Green from you, see if I dont.
Time passed, and Anna was off to school. Mary needed Mrs. Green less, but by then they were family.
– Mary, dont you think youve sat in this job long enough? Mr. Thompson said, peering over the latest paperwork. With your maths, you could go much further. Thought about moving up?
– No. I like it here.
– But I need more from you. Reliable, clever staff are hard to come by. What do you sayretraining on the company coin? Ill see how best to use your talents.
A promotion, new prospects her life changed faster than she could keep up. Things finally looked up. Anna grew, finances eased, and Mary could finally breathe easy.
– Thats grand, Mary, absolutely grand! Mrs. Green beamed, genuinely happy.
Theyd long outgrown strictly business. So when Mrs. Green disappeared, Mary was frantic.
– Natalie, where could she be? She didnt mention anything, just vanished. Its not like her!
– Have you called the hospitals?
– Everywhere. Theyve refused my reportIm not family.
– Her boys?
– Say they dont know anything, cant come. Can you believe that? Shes their mum
– Some people Well, looks like its on you to keep searching.
So Mary started visiting hospitals, one by one.
– Who are you to her? Not family? Then why are you looking? Over and over, the same questions.
After nearly a week, Mary found her.
– She came in with no ID. She was unconscious for two days, then had some memory loss.
Marys heart twisted at the sight of Mrs. Greensmall, pale, fragilein a hospital bed.
– Why didnt anyone answer the phone to tell me she was here? Id have come straight away! What happened?
– Road accident. Possibly temporary memory loss. And who are you, exactly? asked a young doctor.
– Daughter! Wheres the ward manager?
A few hours later, Mrs. Green was moved, and Mary held her hands.
– How do you feel?
– Who are you?
– Im Mary. Its alright. You just need rest.
Marys calls to her sons changed nothing. They made excuses, werent coming.
– Thats fine! Were alright on our own. Mary almost slammed the phone but placed it aside, sighing. Mum, you were rightpeople only care about themselves
Mrs. Green was discharged a week later. Mary took her home.
– Anna, Mrs. Green doesnt remember much, so call her Gran as usual and keep everything peaceful for her, okay? Maybe her memory will come back.
– Mum, will she live with us now?
– Yes.
Anna nodded solemnly.
– Thats right.
It was Annas turn to look after Mrs. Greenshed come home, warm up lunch, coax her to eat, then sit beside her, homework done:
– Once Im done, Gran, well play draughts, yeah?
Mrs. Green always nodded, calling Anna her granddaughter and Mary her daughter. Mary didnt bother correcting her. Did it matter? The point was, she was home, and more or less alright.
Mrs. Greens son turned up six months later.
Mary was rushing home for Annas birthday, clutching a cake, when a vaguely familiar, tall man hailed her at the gate.
– Are you Mary?
– I am.
– Im Stephen. Mrs. Greens son.
– Oh. Hello. Mary tensed, gripping the cake box.
– Could I see my mum?
– Of course. Bit late, though, isnt it?
– Yes I Stephen stammered, prompting Mary to look a bit closer.
– Dont judge people by yourself. I dont want anything from your mum. She helped me more than I can say, so Im just giving back.
– Thats not what I Stephens voice wobbled, and Mary smiled a little.
– Lets just leave it at that. And Ill say thisyoure free to sort her flat, finances, whatever, but as for Mrs. Green herself, youre not taking her anywhere. Don’t even ask.
– Why not? I thought of having her live with us.
– Im sorry, but if you really wanted to, youd have come sooner, when there was hope. Now I cant promise shell even know you. Too much time has passed. Ready?
She headed to the door, but Stephen stopped her.
– Im sorry
– Not to me. Nothing to forgive. Just dont upset her, please.
– Alright.
Anna opened the door, beaming:
– Ooh, nice box!
– Wait until you taste the cake! Happy birthday, love. Mary kissed her. Anna, this is Stephen
– Stephen Green.
– Stephen Green, Mrs. Greens son.
– Who? Anna nearly dropped the cake, but Mary signalled for quiet.
– Remember what the doctor said?
– Dont upset her?
– Exactly. Take the cake to the kitchen, Ill be right there.
Mrs. Green did not recognise her son. For his part, Stephen hardly recognised his own mothershe was nothing like the strong lady he remembered, just a frail old dear in a big armchair.
– Will she ever remember us? Stephen asked Mary, as he left.
– I dont know. Doctors cant say. But I do know shes peaceful here. So lets leave it be. Best not to unsettle her.
– May we come to visit?
– Why are you asking me? Shes your mum. Youre welcome whenever.
Mary watched him walk away, not convinced hed come back oftenor at allbut shrugged and closed the door. So be it. Let the past stay past. They had their own life now, their own little world.
– Anna! Stick the kettle on! Were having a party!
– Mum, can Gran have some cake?
– She must! The biggest slice. She needs a treat what did she always say to you when piling on the jam, Anna?
– A little sweetness? Anna laughed.
– Thats the one! And we could all do with that! Mary turned the key in the door and followed Anna into the kitchen.
