False Beauty
Surely youre joking! You actually broke up? I cant believe it! Marthas eyes grew so wide in disbelief that Thomas felt slightly embarrassed. Her eyebrows shot up towards her hairline and her mouth dropped open, so shocked was she by the news. You would have carried Eve on your shoulders, I was always holding you two up as an example! I even dreamed of having a relationship like yours myself!
Its true, Martha, as mad as it sounds… Thomas stared gloomily out of the window. Beyond the glass, the English weather raged: cold rain hammered on the panes and streamed down in quick rivulets, scattering into tiny droplets along the way. It matched his foul mood. Thomas felt utterly drained. Five years of love weighed heavily on him, washing the colour from the world. A hollowness had moved in where once thered been warmth, shared dreams, gentle glances, and soft embraces. He clenched his fists until his knuckles went white, his voice trembling as he continued, Its over, Martha. Over
But why? Martha pressed on, leaning forward as she searched his face. Eve waited for you all the months you were away on assignment! She was loyal never swayed by gifts or compliments from anyone!
And how would you know all this? Youre in another city, Thomas managed a bitter smile and attempted a joke, Or is this some shining example of female solidarity?
Martha didnt flinch. She leaned back, arms crossed, and flashed a sly yet sincerely worried smile. Yes, I live hundreds of miles from your Eve, but dont forget word gets around. Ive plenty of friends who kept an eye on her. I heard she did take her looks pretty seriously while you were gone. Changed her hairstyle, started going to the gym, updated her wardrobe. Shes tried very hard, Thomas.
Exactly! Thats why we split! Thomas practically darted into the hall, searching his coat for his mobile with nervous, jerky movements, as if trying to outrun his own thoughts. At last, he fished out his phone and hurried back to Martha. Just one photo, he thought, and Martha would see what a mess things had become. You remember what Eve looked like before I left?
Of course, Martha rolled her eyes, though her voice wavered slightly as she summoned the image. Pretty girl. Straight, honey-blonde hair down past her shoulder blades, big blue eyes, neat little nose Good figure too, though perhaps slightly lacking up top, but you were more than content, werent you?
Exactly, I liked her just as she was! Thomass voice rose almost to a shout, then dropped to a dry whisper. His grip tightened on his phone, his eyes hardening. Eve was perfect to me. I loved her as she was. But as soon as Id gone, her daft friends filled her head with nonsense: told her Id stop loving her if she didnt change. And she believed them! She actually did! And so the changes, not because she wanted them, but because someone convinced her Id leave otherwise.
Is it really that awful? Martha asked, an anxious crease forming between her brows. Her fingers gripped the armrest of her chair, uneasy about what mightve happened.
See for yourself! Thomas thrust his phone at her, nearly shoving the screen under her nose. There was Evealmost unrecognisable.
Gone was the thick, shining hair shed always been so proud of now chopped into a far-too-short cut and dyed a garish platinum. Her new hairstyle exposed her neck and ears, but left her looking severe, the softness lost. Her lips had been worked onfar more than necessary. They now looked strangely plumped, out of place on her face, upsetting its natural proportions.
Shed lost over a stonethough instead of looking slender, she looked ill. Sharp collarbones jutted; her ribs showed beneath her skin; her arms were thin and frail. Her complexion was ghostly pale, with dark circles beneath her weary eyes. And the worst, in Thomass eyesshed gone and done something to her bust, something shed never considered before. She knew perfectly well how he felt about such thingshed always cherished natural beauty, never saw sense in these drastic changes.
So there I am watching her greet me at the airport and thinkingI could almost just walk right by, Thomass words shook with emotion. He spun around, struck the wall with his fist, then winced, shaking out the pain. How could she do this to herself in only half a year?! Why didnt she realise I loved her just as she was? I never wanted all these changes!
He paced restlessly, flinging his arms in agitation and stopping short before starting again, like a caged animal. His face alternated between red rage and a sickly pallor. He kept clenching his fists and passing his hands over his face, as if to wipe away the memory altogether.
Martha understood him better than anyone. Shed listened to his endless moans about the insufferable boss whod sent him away for so long. Thomas never wanted to leave Eve behind, but she couldnt come alongfinal year at university, exams looming, and his job needed him at the office. Still, he called her every day, always said he missed her. And now, coming home, it was as if some stranger had taken Eves place.
Perhaps she just wanted to please you? Martha tried gently, rising and walking softly over to him. Maybe someone convinced her youd appreciate the new look
Thomas let out a bitter, humourless laugh and shook his head.
To please me? Shes lost herself! I loved the real her, but now Im not sure who she is anymore.
What troubled Thomas most was Eves refusal to video call. Whenever he suggested it, she dodged, insisting she was preparing a surprise that would delight him. It sounded sweet, but suspicions gnawed at him: was she just hiding another man? The thought plagued him, kept him from focusing at work.
Eventually, Thomas couldnt take it and asked a mutual friend who lived near Eve to discreetly check in, ask around, see what was truly happening. His mate agreed, albeit uncertainly.
A few days later, he rang back.
Shes definitely planning a surprise, the friend said with careful emphasis. Not sure youll like it, though. But shes alonestill asks after you, worries about when youll be home.
That eased Thomass mind. He exhaled in relief, ran a hand through his hair and even smiled. Perhaps he shouldnt fret over a surprise; perhaps it would all turn out fine. Most important, Eve wasnt lyingshe wasnt cheating. The thought of her waiting gave him strength.
Looking back, he now realises it was a mistake to decline the photo his friend offered to send. Had he looked, he mightve intervened before Eve went too far. Perhaps hed have dropped everything, rushed back on the next train, taken her friends to task. But its too late for that now
The day Thomas returned, he was a bundle of nerves. He checked his watch constantly, fidgeted on the plane, then restlessly picked at his coat in the cab. His hands were clammy; his heart pounded wildly. In his mind, he pictured emerging at arrivals, spotting Eves smile and wave, her running to throw her arms around him, breathing in the familiar scent of her hair. Home together, tea brewing, the two of them curled up on the sofa, catching up on every second theyd missed, good and bad.
Reality was far less kind. At the airport exit, he stopped dead. The woman before him was nothing like the Eve he remembered. For an instant, he wondered if hed made a mistakeif he was even looking for the right person. He blinked in confusion, heart turning cold.
Thomas! Ive missed you! Eve ran to embrace him, but he took a step back, avoiding her arms. Her smile faltered, hurt and confusion flickering across her face. Her hands hovered, helpless.
What is it? Dont you like my surprise? Was it that shocking? Eves hopeful yet anxious voice broke the silence as she nervously tucked back a platinum strand.
Im just not sure where my girlfriends gone, Thomas spoke distantly, struggling to marshal himself. The words came out thick and numb. He wanted to scream, to weep, to vent it all, but the crowd around him kept him in check. He took another step away, studying Eve with pained confusion. Are you unwell? Or have you lost your mind? Where are your lovely locks? Wheres your natural figure? You always looked so simply beautiful.
You mean, fat? Eve blew out her cheeks in wounded protest. Her voice trembled, and tears welled up in her sad eyes. She clenched and unclenched her fists, fighting for composure. One of her friends standing nearby snickered, only adding salt to Eves wound. She cast a sharp look at them, but they stared innocently away.
Oh, you neednt spare my feelingsI know I let myself go, Eve pressed on, striving for calm. But now at least you can walk with me in public and not be embarrassed! Look at memodern, stylish. Isnt this better?
And who says I even want to walk down the street with you now? Thomas snapped, his voice harsh. He shook his head, not hiding his disappointment. You were a beautiful girl and now I dont know what youve become. I loved you for who you were. Why didnt you ask what I wanted?
Come now, Thomas! She could be on the cover of a fashion magazine, one of the friends piped up with a broad, knowing smile, slapping Eve on the back as though displaying a prized catch. So many blokes tried chatting her upespecially now after shes changed! You should be grateful. She did it all for you!
Thomas spun, red with irritation.
No, she did it for herselfor should I say, for someone elses idea of beauty! He glared at Eve, voice raw with hurt and anger. Dont blame me for this disaster.
He stepped towards Eve and, in a low voice thick with longing, murmured,
Eve, you knew how I felt about all this. I value whats real, whats natural. What youve done to yourself It isnt what I love. You were wonderful as you were. Now it all feels fakelike youve become someone else.
He paused, running a weary hand through his hair before continuing more quietly, but firmly,
For the past month, all Ive done is dream about coming home and proposing to you. I even bought the ring. I wanted to build a life with you But now Im sorry, but I cant spend it with a stranger.
Eve blanched and tears streamed down her cheeks. She gulped air, trying to speak, but words stuck in her throat. Her lips wobbled, her hands hung limply at her sides. She took a small step forward, as if to reach him, to hold him, to explain that it could all be put right.
Thomas, wait! she finally managed, her voice breaking. I only wanted to make things better for us! For you to be proud of me
But Thomas turned and walked away, moving quickly, barely seeing where he was going, refusing to look back. Fury, disappointment, and pain churned inside him.
Eve shouted something after him, then tried to follow, but her friends held her back.
Let him go! one said loudly, giving Eve an encouraging hug. Youre just upsethes in shock, thats all. Hell come crawling back, begging forgiveness, just give it time. Youre a stunner nowplenty of better men out there!
Eve heard them, but their words floated past as though she were underwater. She simply watched Thomass retreating back, tears mixing with her mascara, feeling emptier than everthe bitter realisation sinking in that, by trying to be better, shed lost what really mattered.
I truly did want to marry her, Thomas concluded, lifting his hands to his face, his shoulders shaking with the effort to contain the pain. I pictured every detail… proposing, seeing her smile, her laughter, our arms around each other But when I saw herlike that Thomass voice dropped to a hoarse whisper. Something just snapped inside me. I simply didnt recognise her anymore. Not at all.
He paused, sighing heavily and staring off towards a memory.
Why are you women always unhappy with how you look? I complimented Eve every day, always told her she was wonderful. I loved her smile, her habitsall the tiny quirks that made her unique. Yet she she wiped all that away, tried to become someone else.
You know what stings most? Thomas pulled his hands from his face, eyes glittering with unshed tears as he clenched his fists. It was her so-called friend behind it all! She did it on purpose, to break us upI see that now.
Why do you think that? Martha said softly, drawn forward by his obvious distress. He looked so hollow, his usual confidence shrunk to a flicker. She tentatively rested her hand on his shoulder.
She came round to my flat, bold as brass! Told me straight out, she was better for me than Eve, all natural beauty, none of these artificial tricks. I nearly threw her out then and there! He rapped his knuckles against the chair in anger, then rubbed his hand through his hair, trying to calm down.
After a deep breath, his fingers still shaking faintly, Thomas fixed his empty gaze on the far wall, gripped by the memory.
And worst of all, his tone softened, she clearly thought Id just fall straight into her arms, like nothing between Eve and me mattered at all. But Im not like that. I loved Eve. And it hurts that she let herself be so swayed.
Martha just sat in silence, unwilling to interrupt, knowing that the wounds ran deep from a breakup fuelled by jealousy and Eves uncertainty. She wanted to console Thomas, but words felt useless.
And now? Did you try talking to Eve? Maybe things could still be made right, if you both wanted it, Martha rested her hand comfortingly on his arm, her voice gentle with compassion.
She likes her new look, and she wont change, Thomas replied, letting a bitter, empty smile cross his lips. He raked a hand over his face as if trying to brush off bleak thoughts. Eve rang and tried to guilt me, said I had no right to leave her after she waited for me. I love heroh, how I love my Eve! But shes gone The Eve I lovedshes gone. Theres someone else left, someone with those strange lips, that unnatural thinness, that that falsehood!
Martha simply reached out and squeezed his trembling hand, her warmth letting him feel less alone. She didnt offer empty reassurancesjust quietly showed she was there.
She saw his trembling fingers, his effort not to cry, the fight to keep grief bottled up. His shoulders shook slightly, his breath caught, his hands opening and closing.
You know, Thomas said softly, eyes lost beyond the rain-streaked window, one autumn, we walked through the park together. Yellow leaves swirling about, she was laughing, her hood kept falling and Id pull it back over her. She said, Thomas, I wish it could be like this forever. And I replied, It will, love, it will. And I truly believed it
His voice broke off as tears threatened. Martha felt the lump form in her own throather heart aching for her friends pain.
And now? he continued, raw desperation clouding his voice. Now she stares in the mirror and sees a beauty. I look and see a stranger. How did everything break so quickly? Why didnt we talk sooner, share what we both wanted?
He finally surrendered to the tears, head bowed, hunched as he weptnot as a grown man, but as a child lost in an unfair world. Martha slid in closer, put her arm gently round his shoulders, trying to offer what little comfort she could.
Thomas, she murmured, steadying her voice, This isnt your fault. You loved her, cherished her, showed her she mattered. If anyones to blame, its jealousy, or luck, but certainly not you. Dont shoulder it all yourself.
Thomas looked up at her, red-eyed, stricken, still doubting. But what if Im wrong? What if I should have tried to understand? Maybe she was scared Id leave her. Maybe someone convinced her she wasnt good enough for me. Perhaps she just wanted to please me, and I ruined everything with my reaction.
Tormented, he clung to the hope that somewhere beneath the surface, his old Eve was still there. The one who drank cocoa at breakfast and drew silly faces in the steam on the window. The one who laughed at his worst jokes and always found a way to cheer him up.
Martha squeezed his hand once more and met his eyes.
Youre allowed your feelings, she said firmly. And you have the right to your boundaries tooyou shouldnt force yourself to accept what feels wrong. But if you truly wish, maybe speak with her. Not for her sake, but for what you had. For the love that still lives in your heart. Let her tell you why, and you share what youve felt.
Thomas took a deep breath, wiped his eyes on his sleeve and looked out again. The rain was easing; the first gold and pink rays of sunset slipped through the parting clouds. He watched the changing light as if searching for a sign.
Perhaps youre right, he whispered. But just now I need time. Time to sort through my own feelings. To understand what comes next. I cant forget everything at once, but I dont want to lose what we shared, if it can be savedHe sat quietly, letting the hush between them settle into something less painful. Martha didnt speak, just stayed there by his side, a silent promise that he wasnt entirely alone. Outside, the last of the storm clouds drew awayrain-slick stones gleaming, everything washed clean and new beneath the pinkening sky.
As the light shifted, Thomas reached into his pocket, feeling the small velvet boxa promise waiting, now never spoken. He rolled it between his fingers, imagining the moment that would never come. Somewhere deep inside, something softenednot the hurt, but the sharp edge of blame. He realised neither of them had meant for things to end this way. The world was simply messier than the old, certain vows they had whispered in the glow of autumn leaves.
He set the ring gently on the table beside his empty cup, then finally looked Martha in the eyea small, tired smile flickering at the corner of his mouth. Perhaps love is knowing when to let go, he said. Or maybe its just caring enough to wish, quietly, that the other finds happinesseven if it isnt with you.
Martha nodded, caught in the fragile hope of his words.
And as the sun dipped beneath the horizon, Thomas felt the weight in his chest loosenjust a little. In the soft, silent twilight, he understood: sometimes beauty was not in the face or the shape or the style, but in the courage it took to accept the changes life demanded. And as the world outside glimmered, washed clean, he allowed himselffor the first timeto believe that loss, too, could lead to something honest and new.
Tomorrow, he thought, he would call Eve. Not to try and reclaim the past, but to say goodbye, gentlyhonouring not just what was lost, but what they had managed to love so fiercely, even for a little while.
Outside, the storm had passed. The world, for a moment, was full of possibility.
