Be Happy, Mum
Emily, weve got a disaster! her sisters voice rang so loudly, Emily actually recoiled and held the phone away from her ear. Are you hearing me? Why arent you saying anything?
If youd allow me a second to speak, perhaps Id manage, Emily replied, not particularly bothered just yet. Her sister Clare was famous for panicking over the most inconsequential things.
Mums getting married! How do you like that for news? I mean, honestly! What on earth is she thinking?
Clare continued on her tirade, but Emily had zoned out already. It was, she admitted, quite the bombshell. Still, it was Clareshe could easily be overreacting. Best ring Mum and find out for herself before believing any of her sisters tales.
Em! Hello? Are you there?
I hear you. Stop bellowing.
I caught them myself! Yesterday. I asked Mum to take Sophie to her ballet class and she said no. I had to do it myself. What sort of grandmother doesnt care about her own granddaughter but has time to be all cosy with some random man in a café? Dear me!
Emily let out a sigh. Ah, so that was it.
I made quite the scene, you shouldve seen it! Mum looked like she wanted the ground to swallow her whole.
You do have a particular talent for that.
Dont laugh, Emily! This is serious! She wont listen to a word I say!
Clare, give it a rest. Why should Mum do as you say?
The silence that followed gave Emily time to turn the hob off and plant a kiss on her sons head as he came racing in, eager to show off his Lego airplane.
You Em! I just dont get you You dont care that Mum is making such a huge mistake? That shell be betraying Dads memory? How could you?
And you? Clare, Dads been gone nearly fifteen years. Mums not exactly ancientshes spent all these years focusing on us, then on our children. Isnt that enough? Arent you being rather cruel? This is your second marriage, isnt it? Why, pray tell? Because you wanted a bit of happiness for yourself. And yet, you dont want the same for Mum. If you can explainreally explainwhy she cant have what you did, lets hear it. Maybe Id consider your point of view.
I never expected this from you, Emily! How spectacularly heartless can you get about your own mothers fate?
Or perhaps, this isnt about Mums fate at all. Maybe its that your ever-reliable, free babysitter has dared find something else to do with her golden years, is it?
Emily! Clare squealed, losing her words entirely. Her big sister could drive anyone round the twist with her calm tone and wickedly pointed remarks. Granny always said Emily had a knack for knocking the crown straight.
Well, go on?
You! Youre impossible!
I know. And you, my dear, are a delicate buttercup. Give Mum some peace, all right?
Not a chance! I actually care about her, you know. Why does she need all this romantic nonsense? She should live quietly!
Thats not for you to decide, Clare, Emily sighed, dropping onto the kitchen bench. Her eldest daughter popped her head round the door with an arched eyebrow; Emily gave a quick shake of the headnothing serious. Lizzie retreated to her room. Bliss, when children can read you with half a look. If only things with Mum had always been so simple.
Susan, mother to Emily and Clare, married very youngbarely eighteen. Simon, her chosen one, was just a year older. Theyd sat side by side since reception. On their first day, a big-eared boy took his assigned seat next to a tall, rosy-cheeked girl sitting upright, her hands neatly folded, and said,
Youre pretty!
Susan arched an eyebrow, not even bothering to turn her head. Well, obviously. She knew. The hair bows alone were worth itMum had found proper crimped ribbon, so her hair was the best in the class. The other girls only wore ordinary white bows, but hers were special…
Simon, slighted, retaliated during break and slapped Susan on the head with his reading book. Her hairstyle never recovered, Susan had a great sob, but she gave as good as she got. Turned out Simon wasnt actually such a troublemaker, and he proved to be plenty useful. He wasnt tall, but he was strong and, more importantly, clever. At first Susan felt awkward pairing up with him, but soon she didnt care what anyone said. Let them be jealous! She had a friend, and her friend had such brains that Susan quickly learned to go to Simon, not the teacher, if there was anything she didnt understand. No one in their class was brighter than those two. And, come fifteen, something inside Simon went click and he shot up, suddenly towering over Susan.
Now, Im the beanpole! Simons voice was getting deep as anything, but he laughed just the same, in that odd squeaking at the end. And youre Thumbelina!
Imagine calling ME tiny! Susan would roar with laughter in response. She remained the tallest girl in the yeargood bones, as Gran would saysolid and stately, carrying herself with the confidence of a queen. No one dared make fun of her. Her posture was a gift from Gran, whod insisted on gymnastics. Susan never achieved sporting stardom, but she got what mattered: good posture, confidence, and a will to win.
At their wedding, guests couldnt help but smile. Tall, spindly Simon gently held Susans hand; she only came up to his shoulder now, but she could still easily shield her new husband.
Emily arrived bang on cue, nine months after the wedding. The young couple, not quite ready for parenthood, muddled through anyway. Susan, never one to back down, kept up her studies, helped on all sides by her mum and mother-in-law, while Simon took a second job.
Nothing to itits only a blip. Well be fine, just wait and see, hed say, rocking Emily in his arms. I promise you, everything will work out.
And it did. They were hardly rolling in cash, but they never wanted for much. Susan went back to work, handed Emily to nursery, and life got easier. Smart and capable, she shot up the career ladder, Head of Accounts in five years. There was always side worklittle businesses sprang up all over and needed a steady hand to balance their books.
Youre not just beautiful, youre brilliant, Simon would grin, giving his bespectacled wifeknee-deep in paperwork at the kitchen tablea cuddle. Ill take Emily for a walk so you can work in peace.
It was a good life, as Gran would say. But, for some reason, there were no more children. Susan was upsetshed always dreamed the kids would be close in age.
Theyll be great friends!
But fate turned its own way. Simon, now Mr. Wakefield, was head of a major company and tried to reassure Susan.
Weve got Em, and shes wonderful. If we get more, great. If not Susan would kiss their daughter, making quiet wishes.
Clare was a surprise to all. Susan, having given up hope of a second child, was beside herself. So was Simonhe nearly lost his marbles when he heard the news. Emily wanted a sibling, but, being young, she had no idea what itd be like. Everything changed overnight.
I dont want to be the big sister! Emily howled, two years after Clares birth. I want to be little again!
Ten-year-old Emily couldnt fathom why everyone made such a fuss over a baby. Of course, she didnt remember her own debut, but gossiping grannies quickly filled her in.
With Em, it was all easy. Nursery at the right age, job done. But with Clare? Oh, Susan, youre spoiling her!
Shes a bit frail, you never know! I dont want to put her in nursery. No need, either. I can afford to stay at home now.
Frail Clare was all chubby cheeks, golden curls, and blue eyes. An angel, not a child! people would croon.
Only Emily knew the dark side of that angelic face.
Mum! Shes picking on me again! Clares wailing would ricochet around the house, and Susan would rush in.
Clare would fling herself dramatically to the floor, sobbing and clutching any convenient limb, as Emily hovered in confusion. Each time, shed fall for these tricks and be told off by the parents.
What happened? Emily!
I didnt even touch her!
Mum, I just asked for her pencils and she shoved me. But Im fine now, Ill get upow! It hurts!
Susan would fuss over her little darling, while Clare secretly pulled faces at her big sister behind her back. Oh, just you wait!
Clares antics became more elaborate over time, until one day Simon happened upon the scene. Popping his head into the girls room, he saw Clare methodically ripping pages from her workbooks. She was in Year 2 by now, and Susan was having a devil of a time with her youngestwilful and lazy.
Emily was a dream! Not once did she embarrass me. But Clares enough reason to avoid parents evening altogether. The boys do better!
Pouting, Clare would twirl a strand of hair and sulk. When the moment was right, shed give an artful sniffle and turn away.
You dont have to love me since Im so useless, shed whisper just loud enough for Susan to hear.
Nagging would instantly cease. Clare loathed being compared to her sister, so mischief quickly became a habit. The parents default: blame Emily, the eldest.
Youre older, so theres more expected of you!
One day, seeing Clare drop another mangled workbook, Simon quietly ushered Emily away.
Dad? Whats happening? Emily asked, baffled as her father shut the lounge door and listened for sounds in the house.
Right, listen up. Im going to tell you off in a minute, but its all an act, okay? Dont be upset, just play along. Weve let Clare get away with everything. If this doesnt work, Im out of ideas.
Emily, lost for words, flopped onto the sofa, tears of confusion welling up.
Not yet, Em! I cant do this without you!
When Emily had dabbed her eyes, Simon mustered a performance worthy of EastEnders.
Soon, Clare let out a theatrical howl as Emily entered the room.
Emily! Why? What did I ever do to you? My homeworks ruined! Ill have to redo it all! Why?
Susan rushed in, knife left on the chopping board, to find the usual scene: the youngest, sobbing, blue eyes blazing; the eldest, impassive.
Whats happened now, sweethearts?
Mum! I dont understandwhy is Emily so mean to me? Clare clutched shredded workbooks.
Simon stepped in, surreptitiously winking at Emily, and launched into his tirade.
If Emily cant behave, well have to send her away. Grandparents are too old, so that only leaves one thing
Whats that? Clare immediately forgot her tears, curious.
A boarding school!
Whats that?
Where children live and study, and only come home for weekends and holidays, if their behaviours up to scratch.
Emily turned in horror, just catching the panic flickering on Clares face.
Thats it, its settled! Em, start packing. Ill take you myself.
Dad Emily stammered, peering at Mum. Really? Youd do that?
Clare slumped on a chair, silent, but guilt flickered on her face. She had a vivid imagination, and suddenly the thought of Emily vanishing into the arms of strangers hit home.
Simon waited, watching, and exhaled in relief when Clare finally sobbed, clutching Susans knees.
Dont! Dont send Emily away!
Why not? Simon prompted, eyebrow raised.
She didnt do anything! Clares voice broke. It was me! I did it all!
I know. Simon smiled, hugging Emily, who promptly buried her face in his chest. I know everything. You tore up the books, you accused Em. Im ashamed I didnt see it sooner.
Susan opened her mouth to defend her youngest, but thought better of it. How had she missed it all these years? And Emily She put her hands on Clares shoulders and turned her round, looking her in the eyes.
Im ashamed, too. And theres one more thing I dont trust you anymore, Clare. Youll have to work hard for me to see you as the good girl I thought you were.
Then she turned to Emily and pulled her close. Forgive me, poppet! Please!
The results were swift. Clare sobered up, quit her manipulative games, and for the first time became an ordinary childno longer family royalty. No ands or buts: if she wanted her familys trust again, shed have to earn it. It took her over three years to mend things with Emily; bit by bit, she proved she wasnt the same old pest. Emily watched her warily, expecting a trick, but finally relaxed and let Clare in.
That ones persistent! Takes after you, Simon laughed to Susan, who tried her hardest never to give Clare special treatment again. She felt guilt gnawing away at her whenever she thought about Emily. I missed it, Si. I missed my chance, and now Ems all grown up.
Quit torturing yourself. If you cant go back, then build something new. Shes not a child nowmaybe she needs something different from you.
Susan took his words to heart. In time, she and Emily built a peaceful relationship. No grudges, no expectations.
Emily was by her mums side when Simon passed on. The stress and relentless schedule had their way; his second heart attack took him suddenly, leaving behind wife and daughters.
Susan was lost in grief, barely holding herself togetheruntil her first granddaughter was born two months later. Pregnant Emily had moved herself and her husband back to Susans flat, convinced that only a helpless newborn would draw her mother out of despair. Placing baby Lizzie in Susans arms, Emily said,
Mum, I need youme and Lizzie. Dont let us down.
And Susan didnt. Lizzie, then little Harry, became her new purpose. When Lizzie turned one, Emily returned to her own home, and Susan split her life between her two daughters.
Clare rather liked the freedom at first, especially after Susan would pop off to help Emily. By sixth form, she considered herself quite the local star.
House is free!one phrase, thrown into conversation, and she was the queen once more.
But Clare was careful. She knew well that one slipone bit of hot gossipand her reputation would be in tatters again. She avoided the trouble others fell into, kept her relationships casual. Michael, her first husband, entered the scene at university.
Marriage, degree, a daughterClare was soon tangled in adult life. Oddly, she found herself competing with Emily again. It was vital that her own children were smarter, more accomplished, better than Emilys. Susan, for her part, ran a tight ship: clubs, sports, lessons all mapped by the hour, with Grandma on hand to help (but not indulge).
Thats how life works now, Mum! You must start young to get anywhere.
Emily would just laugh at her, watching Clare pontificate about the great gender-and-skill divide.
Everythings backwards with you! Lizzie does karate, and Harrys into painting! What are you thinking?
It works for us, Clare. If someone disagrees, well, they can do whats right however they see fit, cant they?
Clare would snort but save her lectures for Susan, who would nod along and quietly spoil the grandchildren with ice cream, her only rebellion against the mad dash of modern parenting.
So when Susans new romance appeared on the horizon, Clare panicked. Would all her perfectly planned schedules fall apart now? What sort of love affair is this at Mums age, for goodness sake? Love! What a joke! She and Dad had love, not this whatever it was! Who on Earth even was this Major? Where did Mum even meet him?
Had Clare actually asked, she wouldve been stunned. Susan hadnt set out looking for romance. She met Richard, the retired Colonel, while waiting for her granddaughter at ballet class. The silver-haired, upright man caught her attentionhe was so familiar somehow. Eventually, Susan realised he was strikingly like Simon might have looked, had he made it to his own silver years. For a week they simply nodded to each other; then a proper hello, then a conversation, thenwell, a late life romance.
Richard was a widower, long retired, whose world revolved around his only grandchild, Katie, who danced with Susans granddaughter Sophie.
My beacon and my joy! Richard would say, wrapping his granddaughter in a scarf.
Susan, seeing this, realised just how much she wanted someone to tie her scarf with the same gentle patience. After years caring for everyone else, she longed for someone to care for her. Her daughters had their own lives and never enough time. And sometimes, you want an adult who understandssomeone to talk to about strawberries, the price of cheese, or whether Betjeman truly trumps Larkin.
Richard was a practical man.
Were no spring chickens, Susan. Why waste time? Allow me to offer you my heart, my hand, and my home. Youll be the lady of the house, and Ill serve as your adjutant, if youll have me. What do you think? We have nothing to lose, and so much to gain.
Susan hesitated, especially after Clares explosion. Embarrassed and apologising to Richard, she found reassurance.
No need to apologise, Susan! Its an understandable reaction. I was half at faultI should have introduced myself as a proper gentleman. I could have been absolutely anyone! Your daughter has a point. Heres my proposal: lets have both our families over to my cottage this Sunday. Well introduce everyone, tell them whats what. They dont get a vote, but they do deserve a heads up.
Perhaps youre right Susan wiped her eyes, mortified by Clares behaviour.
And stop winding yourself up! Itll all work out, youll see! Richard said, gently squeezing her hand.
So, on Sunday, the families assembled at Richards cottage. Emily, Clare, and Richards daughter-in-law, Helen, buzzed around the kitchen. The men manned the barbecue.
Clare eyed the spacious house and whispered: Did you know?
About what? That hes well-off? Oh, Claregive over! Would you show him any respect if he had nothing but a rickety chair? No, youd be appalled. Thats you all over. Emily gave her a sharp look as Helen came in.
Does your mum like wild strawberries? Helen asked with a smile.
Emily and Clare exchanged glances.
Not sure, Helen. She does love strawberries though.
Well, shell love thesetheres a whole patch in the garden. Dad planted it. Maybe the children can pick some and bring them for pudding?
Sitting at the big table, Clare quietly surveyed the scene.
Sophie and Katie sprinted past, cackling; Richard spun them in the air and sent them off to help with setting the table.
Emily chortled at Helens story, glancing Clares way.
Susan set plates along the edge, smiled up at Richard, who slipped his arm around her and muttered something in her ear. Clare watched as the years seemed to melt from her mothers face. For a moment, she saw her as young again.
She stood and slipped up to her mother.
Mum
Susan turned. Clare suddenly realised she barely recognised herhere was her mum, but whole, happy, younger somehow.
Im sorry, Mum, truly. I justwell, I really want you to be happy. If you think Richard can do that, then Ill be glad.
Oh, Clare! Susan gave her youngest a hug, and, just like a child, Clare pressed in close.
Im hopeless, arent I? Always the slow one! Clare wiped her tears, laughing.
It doesnt matter, long as you get there! Emily had joined them, hugging her mums shoulders. Im so happy for you, Mum. Thats all that mattersright, Clare?
Clare nodded, hugging her mum even tighter.
Standing embraced by her daughters, Susan shut her eyes. This, herethis was happiness. Her heart was light, nothing ailed her. Tomorrow, thered be new troubles, new worries. But today, in this moment, everything was right. Let it last! The future could wait.
Granny! Sophie tumbled up the steps, wrapping her arms around the three of them. Harrys got the cake out of the fridgethe one we brought!
Good for him! Susan ruffled her granddaughters fair hairso like her own. Tell him to count everyone and slice the cake so everyone gets a piece. Well put the kettle on!
Can I have two pieces?
As many as you like, loveas long as Harrys worked out the maths!
Better let me do it, Sophie giggled. You never know with him!Emily grinned at her mother and sisterthis strange new family, all finding their places. The hum of laughter floated from the garden as Richard and the grandkids dodged bubbles from the washing-up, light shimmering in the afternoon sun. Clare wiped her cheeks, no longer embarrassed by joy or even her own mistakes; Susan put a hand to her chest, feeling the warmth bloom there and anchor her anew.
Richard poked his head in, mock-solemn. If those ladies dont get outside soon, Im afraid the Major and I will be forced to eat all the strawberries ourselves. Orders are orders!
Well, we cant have that, Susan said, smiling at the familiar twinkle in his eyes.
So they streamed out togetherthree generations, all traces of old hurts fading in the gentle shade of the cherry trees. Plates passed, glasses clinked, and laughter rose in the summer air. Clare watched her mother and thought, for once, not of the past but of all the happiness yet to come.
At the table, as the first crumbly slice of cake appeared, Susan caught her daughters hands in hers, holding on for just a moment longer. Thank you, my girls, she whispered, tears glinting, for finally letting me be happy.
And Emily squeezed tight, Clare noddedno more protests, no more sorrow, only the promise of a new beginning, as sweet and fresh as wild strawberries in June.
