This flat wont have you or your things in it
Why have you left your plate so close to the edge? Nick nodded at the side of the table, his eyes not moving from his phone. Maisie will just knock it off.
Shes five, a little livewire. You know what shes like!
I paused, fork in mid-air.
Nick, remind me, when did Maisie move in here? I thought it was you and me living together! Why is she always here?
He finally put his phone down and pulled the plate of sausages towards himself.
Weve gone over this a thousand times! I chose you for a reason, you know I wanted someone with no strings attached, no extra problems. No kids, basically!
Perfect to slot into our family. Youll be Maisies second mum.
Think what an advantage for the child two mothers, both loving Maisie and looking after her.
You dont object, do you?
Second mum? I slowly put my fork down. Did you even ask your ex-wife? Is she thrilled about this?
Oh, who asks her anything Nick waved me off, his mouth full. Shes rushed off her feet, always grumpy, always knackered.
Youre different! Look at this flat, its massive, loads of space Maisie can have her own corner.
You work from home anyway, whats so hard about keeping an eye on a kid? Feed her, take her out to the park, read her a book.
Nick, weve known each other for six weeks. Youve lived here for three of them, because your mate in your rented place snores like a train through the wall and you said the microwave broke.
Your childs been here for four days straight! Did you ever ask if I wanted to be a mum first, second, or otherwise?
Why would I ask? he actually looked puzzled, pausing mid-chew. All women want this. Instinct, isnt it.
And when I saw your dating profile I knew straight away youre the one.
No messy ex-husbands lurking about, no kids of your own to distract you from my daughter. Makes total sense.
Ive got to think of Maisies future, I want her in a proper environment. And you well, youre just that. Look around, everythings spotless, everything in its place. Kids need that.
I thought back to our first date Nick had seemed reliable.
Divorced, honest about his kid that had won me over.
Id been through a terrible divorce myself two years ago, and I valued someone who was upfront.
I didnt have children, not because I couldnt, but because I always wanted to stand on my own two feet first.
And I had. My own flat, steady job, savings The only thing missing was a decent bloke.
For the first couple of weeks, Nick was the picture of thoughtfulness: brought flowers, fixed a socket (it was working anyway), always listened.
Then one day, his bag just appeared here, then another one.
Then his shoes always muddy started taking over the entire doormat.
And now, his five-year-old daughter.
What time are you free tomorrow? Nick asked, polishing off his third sausage. I was hoping you could mind Maisie for me.
Need to pop round to the boys at the garage, bit of business.
And youll get some proper time with her.
Youve never even spent time with her on your own yet.
Ive got a video call with a client at four, Nick.
I dont have time to raise someone elses child!
Nick acted like he hadnt heard a word.
Oh, by the way, could you nip to the shops? You havent even got any sweets in for the kid. And grab some fruit, she only likes red apples, hates green ones.
Tess, why are you so prickly tonight? Im trying for us here. I want you two to be friends.
You do get that if were serious, Maisie is part of the family, right?
Brilliant. Just brilliant!
Nick frowned.
Dont you want her to have a proper family? My ex she cant cope.
But you youve got backbone! Youll get Maisie disciplined in no time. And itll take so much pressure off me.
When Im back in work Ill know the flats tidy, kids sorted, dinner on the table.
Isnt that what everyone wants?
Everyone being who, exactly? You and your mum? I pushed my chair back and started clearing plates. In the three weeks youve lived here, you havent once bought groceries.
You havent paid a single pound to the bills.
What you have done is start rewriting my entire work schedule to fit around your child.
Youre on this again! Nick leapt up. I told you, works patchy at the minute! The second I get a job, Ill pay you back.
What are you, money-obsessed? I thought you were better than that. But here you are, counting pennies.
He stormed out, and a minute later the TV erupted from the living room his usual move when in a strop.
***
I washed the dishes, dried my hands and walked in.
Nick was sprawled across the cream sofa, muddy feet on my oak-and-glass coffee table.
My coffee table, that Id spent six months choosing and never allowed so much as a mug on it with no coaster.
Take your feet off, I said, calmly.
Oh, here we go he grumbled, but took them down. Have you calmed down yet? Lets not get into all this again.
Im going out at four tomorrow, end of. Weve got to get life sorted.
At four tomorrow, therell be no one here, Nick.
What do you mean? You going somewhere? Cant you reschedule your call?
No, Nick. You misunderstood. At four tomorrow, there wont be you in this flat, or any of your things, and definitely not your daughter.
Slowly, Nick sat up.
What are you on about?
Pack your bags, Nick. Now. Im not joking.
Over what, exactly?! his voice jumped an octave. Because I wanted you to bond with Maisie?
What, do you hate kids or something? You must be some kind of monster. Shes five!
I dont hate children, Nick. What I dont like is being taken for a ride. I dont like being used as a convenient appliance.
You werent looking for a girlfriend you were looking for free boarding for you and your kid.
Somewhere you could live rent-free, with a woman happy to take on jobs that arent hers.
You you selfish cow! He bolted to his feet. Living in your precious mausoleum of a flat!
Everything lined up, dead as a doornail. I was trying to give you some colour, teach you what its like to raise a sweet child.
All you care about is your precious four walls!
Whos going to want someone like you, what, thirty-plus with that personality?
Youll run crawling back in a week, begging me to return!
Your bags are in the hall, Nick. Ill put the rest out now. Wake up your daughter and get her ready as well.
Ill leave myself! Gladly! he rushed into the bedroom, grabbing clothes, dropping hangers all over.
Youll regret this. You have no idea what a catch I am.
I dont drink, dont carouse, everythings for the family! See how you like it at forty, when youve no one to bring you a glass of water!
Maisie would have done that for you! Wed have raised her right. Now tough luck!
He darted round the flat, stuffing crumpled t-shirts, his brushes, chargers, into bags.
I stood in the door, arms folded, just watching.
Do you even realise what youve done? Youve ruined a childs dream! Id already promised her youd buy her that new doll when you two got close!
Shes desperate for that baby doll you can feed costs a hundred quid!
What am I supposed to tell her now? That Auntie Tess is just a wicked witch?
Tell her the truth, Nick. That her dad tried to live off someone else, but it didnt work out.
Nick dumped the bags on the landing, lifted his sleeping daughter, wrapped her in her blanket and hurried out.
I closed the door after them, went to the kitchen, threw away the half-eaten sausages.
Ran a bath, sank into hot water, let my eyes drift shut.
Dear God, it felt good! Id forgotten what it was like to be on my own
***
Two hours later, my phone was glowing red from Nicks messages.
Youve made a massive mistake.
Told my mum the lot, shes in shock. You booted a child out! At night!
Give me back my electric razor, left it in your bathroom.
Silent now, are you? Not too proud to apologise and beg me back? Never mind, Ill wait
I blocked his number. The razor I just stuck on the stairwell windowsill.
***
A week later I ran into him at the shopping centre by chance.
Nick was in the food court with another woman.
I recognised the performance immediately him talking excitedly, gesturing wildly.
Next to her was a pram with a sleeping baby.
Nick looked the model gentleman: handing her napkins, beaming, even rocking the pram a little.
I walked by without slowing. It looked like hed decided on a new strategy find someone who already had kids, a ready-made team, and, likely, hitch another ride, this time as a real dad.
Months passed.
I lived my life: work, yoga, dinners with friends.
One day, in our old classmates group chat, someone a mate of Nicks shared a story.
Nick had found the one.
A woman with two kids and a big flat bang in the centre.
Turned out, the new girlfriend was sharp. She caught on quick that her perfect catch wasnt planning on pitching in and wasnt about to help raise her boys.
One night, when Nick turned up with Maisie for a surprise weekend, she simply didnt open the door.
His things, all of them, were left in bin bags by the lift. Shed even managed to get in touch with his ex-wife, found out about his real earnings.
Turns out hed been hiding cash-in-hand jobs to pay next to nothing in child support.
After that chat, his ex took him to court and he got landed with back payments.
Now he had nowhere to live but his mums cramped old council flat, sleeping in the box room.
I closed the laptop, smiling.
Two mums! Honestly. What was he thinking?
At thirty-one, I know exactly what I want.
And more importantly exactly what and who Ill never put up with again.
Turns out, you can be very happy indeed, even with no freeloaders in sight.
