Honestly, maybe Im just an old-fashioned English woman, and maybe things are different now, but I dont think so. My mum never sat me down and said, When you go to a relatives house, make sure you bring a little something with you. She never taught me that directly. Still, its always been second nature to me, almost like two and two makes four. I cant say exactly where it came frommaybe from books I read, films I watched, or even plays.
So, on Saturday my husbands cousin turned up for a visit. He came because there was an uncles funeral, but not on our side of the family. We knew in advance, so we told them they could stay overnight with us and not worry about finding a hotel.
They arrived that evening, three of them: his son and his daughter-in-law as well. I cooked dinner, did some roast meat, vegetables, saladsthe works. We sat down together, raised a glass to reconnecting after so long. Later, I sorted everyone out with beds, and in the morning I put together breakfastproper sandwiches, tea, coffee.
They went off to the funeral, and later the younger ones headed into town.
Everything seemed fine, honestly. But they turned up empty-handed, didnt bring a single thing. My husbands dad, God rest his soul, was this cousins godfather, and my mother-in-law (his wife) now lives with us; the cousin knew that. Its not about moneywere comfortable enoughbut he could have brought at least a box of chocolates. My mother-in-law waited for them, kept peering out the window. She even shed a little tear, she was so touched.
Thats what I wouldve done, you know? For children or older folkyou always bring a little something, even if its just a souvenir or a fridge magnet. Id think about what to buy, figure out something for everyone.
Theyre not struggling, so its not about that. Its just that hes a rare visitor, and he never arrives with anything.
Dont think Im upset over the foodits not that at all. When my son gave them a lift, his wife didnt even pop out to say hello, and no one invited him in for tea, not even for a quick cuppa. I just dont get it.
Its not about the food, reallyit just feels a bit uncomfortable. Were all welcoming people, but it almost feels like weve been taken advantage of. Maybe this is just how everyone does things now. Theres a saying, Cheek will get you far, but honestly, thats just not me.
