Lily
Lily, look at these ribbons Mum got me! – Mary twirled in front of Lily, making her long plaits swish and her pink bows bounce like flowers at the ends. Marys hair, with its thick, golden waves and sturdy braids, had all the girls in the cul-de-sac sighing with envy. From babyhood, Marys mother, Hope, had guarded every strand as if it were a national treasure.
For a girl, her hair is her crown. Look at that sparkle! Hope would drape a section over her wrist to show Mary. No one could walk past without staring at hair like this!
So Mary endured the ritual: the endless cleansings, the patient detangling, the brushing that sometimes tugged a bit too hard. Perched on a kitchen chair, she sat stilleven when Mum yanked a bitbecause beauty, she decided, was worth a bit of discomfort. Anyway, it was all about the look on Lilys face when Mary would flick a thick braid over her shoulder and wind a curl round her finger. That wide-eyed admiration? Worth everything.
And Lily was envious, no hiding it. She genuinely believed Mary was the prettiest girl shed ever seen; her own wild, springy mop just didnt compare. Nature seemed to have played a trick on her: Lilys hair puffed up, refusing to be tamed by any brush or comb, going whichever way the wind blew. No matter how Mrs Palmer wrestled it each morning, it always bounced backstubborn, independent, and untidy.
Lily, any woman would turn green with envy seeing your hair. They pay good money at the salon for curls like yours! And youve got them for free!
Lily just frowned.
Mum, Id swap it all for plaits like Marys.
I just cant manage plaits on you, pet. Your hairs impossible, and as for long plaitsforget it. Maybe some tiny braids, but why hide such lovely curls, flower? Mrs Palmer tied Lilys ribbons into little puffs and kissed her on the forehead. Want to know a secret?
Of course!
Theres never been a woman whos happy with every bit of how she looks. If she has straight hair, she wants curls; if its curly, she wants it straight. Her nose is too big, or legs are too shortsomethings always not right. We all want perfection, and theres nothing wrong in striving. But if we were all the same, marching down the road like identical brooms, would that really be pretty?
No way!
Exactly. Were all special in our own ways. You can turn whats yours into your strength. If you adore Marys plaits, be happy she has them. But just so you knowshe definitely envies your curls too.
Really?
I know for sure. But shell never admit it.
Why not?
Because thats how girls are, love! Marys just cottoned on to it a bit sooner. If she tells you theres something about you thats better than her, well, you might just stop gazing at her like shes the best biscuit in the tin! Off you pop, your friends waiting for you.
Mary and Lily had one of those funny friendships. Theyd grown up side by sidesame nursery, same school, practically sharing the same life, day in, day out. But mixed in, there was always that silly, inevitable competition. Never a proper bust-up, but a sense that something was a bit off between them. Lily, as an only child, was good at letting things go, not one to drag things out. Mary, on the other hand, had an older sister, and thanks to Sarah, shed become quite the pro at putting people in their place, as Sarah always put it, though what place that was, Mary wasnt sure.
Still, their childhood was happy. The mums did everything to make sure the girls missed out on nothing. Hope worked at John Lewis, and the girls were always a bit better-dressed than others in the streetmatching anoraks and shiny shoes. Mrs Palmer was always grateful for her friends help. The only complaint the girls had was that their outfits usually matched each other, but they tolerated itfor a while. It was only when they showed up at a friends sixteenth birthday party in identical dresses and everyone had a chuckle that they started questioning things. After that, Mrs Palmer, who worked at the local theatre, found a clever solution: shed buy fabric, and a friendly seamstress would sew the girls unique dresses. Problem solved.
So, Lily, have you decided what youll do after school? Mary asked, already guessing the answer. Ever since she could remember, Lily had tried to fix every lost kitten, every stray pup, every hurt bird she came across. Her mother put up with animal chaos, recognising her daughters knack for caring.
Im off to study medicine.
Its hard to get in. Mary snapped her biology revision book shut and shook it at Lily. All this to memorise!
And more besides. Mums already brought home a stack of practice questions for me.
But youre only in Year Eleven! Mary stared at her, amazed.
So? Im hoping theres enough time before the exams.
Well, I want to work in retail, just like Mum. Never want to hear the word shortage again.
Mary couldnt yet imagine that, in a few years, shop shelves would finally be full, but retail would still be a solid job. Years later, after selling her nans London flat, shed open three shops in a row, lose it all, then build it up again, sheer determination carrying her through. But all that came laterright then, theyd sit at Lilys nans cottage in Kent, pretending to study but mostly daydreaming.
Lily!
Yeah?
Did you see how Alex looked at me yesterday? Mary tossed her head so her plaits brushed the floor behind her chair. I think he fancies me.
Lily stayed quiet. How could she tell Mary that Alex hadnt been looking at her at all? Mary was always convinced that she was the centre of everyones attention, certain all admiration belonged to her and her alone. Who wouldnt notice her tall figure and pretty face, especially standing next to sturdy, freckled Lily with her wild hair? Mary always said Lily looked a bit like a clownbig shoes and that mad mop of hair. She was still slim now, but, Mary reckoned, in a few years Lily would grow into just another plump, middle-aged lady like all the others. Mary, though? Shed inherited the best bits: Dads height and blue eyes, Mums delicate profile and, of course, those unbeatable plaits. Once, when they were looking at Botticellis *The Birth of Venus,* Lily gasped: Thats you! You, Mary!
Mary never felt prouder.
Lily got up and slapped her revision book down. Want some squash?
I do! Wait, Lilyshould I tell Alex I fancy him, you think?
Lily sighed. Shed been putting this off, but clearly, there was no avoiding it.
Well, see, the thing is, Mary, um
What? Did he ask you to talk to me? Mary clapped her hands, excited.
No, Mary. Yesterday, I was sitting next to him.
And?
He wasnt looking at you.
Mary laughed. So, who then? Surely not you? She grinned, ready for the joke, but suddenly stopped and frowned. You?
Yeah. I wasnt sure how to tell you. He actually told me two weeks ago he liked me and asked me out.
Oh Mary stood slowly, moving to the window. She couldnt have described her feelings if she tried; it wasnt that she especially loved Alex, but that hed chosen Lily over her? Unthinkable!
So? What did you say? Mary kept her voice steady, secretly channelling all her big-sister training.
I said it wasnt the right moment. Exams, you know This was only half-true. Shed said as much to Alex but glossed over the fact she fancied him too.
Mary stared. Lily couldnt lie to save her life, and Mary just felt herself brimming with determination; soon enough, shed have Alex strolling round the village with her, because, wellhow could he pick wild-haired Lily over her?
But the little battle for Alex never happened. That very evening, Lilys dad arrived, his face serious.
Mums in hospital, love. We need to get back to London.
Mrs Palmer had never made much fuss about her health, and even now shed brushed off her discomfort. It was luck alonea heart scare at rehearsalthat meant she was rushed to hospital in time.
Im alright, sweetheart! All over now! Mrs Palmer hugged Lily, whod hardly moved from the hospital corridor until they let her in at last.
Mum, you scared me so much!
Oh, dont worry! Im not going anywhere! Even as she joked, Lily could see talking wore her mum out.
For two weeks, Lily lived between home and hospital. She put studying aside, until her mother scolded her over the wasted time: Ill be fine; you cant get time back, can you! Now, since youre here, sit and read!
So Lily sat by the bedside and read medicine texts, barely seeing Mary or Alex. Alex checked in, walked her to the hospital, but never mentioned Marys calls or her determined attention. He tried explaining again: No offence, but theres no one like you for me, just you, but Mary, it seemed, refused to hear it.
Mrs Palmer finally came home just as Lily finished her last exam.
Right, girls. Mums off to the seaside to restLily, youll be staying nearby. Ive sorted a lovely little flat through a friend, and his sister will look after you. Mr Palmer beamed. Ill get down as soon as I can.
The small house in Brighton became Lilys haven. Mrs Newton, the landlady, took Lily under her wing, leading her through the square and showing her to a pretty attic room.
That ones yours. Like it?
Lily did. She loved everythingthe sea breeze, the explosion of cottage garden flowers, cold tap water you could drink straight from the pipe, as Mrs Newton swore.
Days flew by: afternoons walking with her mum, evenings drinking tea and listening to tales about Mrs Newtons family history. A week in, Mrs Newtons nephew turned up on holidaythe same age as Lily, and on his first year of medical school. Once he confessed this, Lily dropped her reserve, firing endless questions at her new colleague.
Mrs Newton watched them fondly, sending them out for walks. Lily, she decided, would make a perfect match for Artie, whom shed raised as a son after her brother died. It didnt take long for Mrs Newton to notice Arties interestsadly, it seemed unreturned. Lily liked him but only as a mate.
So, Lily, got a sweetheart back in London? Mrs Newton finally asked.
Lily went bright red and told her about Alex.
Oh, what a shame! Youd be the perfect daughter-in-law. Never mind, love. Im happy for youwish you both all the best!
That evening, Mrs Newton kissed Artie goodnight and whispered, Hearts already spoken for, I’m afraid.
Artie just nodded, trying to smile. If shes not engaged yet, theres still a chance, he joked, giving his aunt a little squeeze.
Back in London, Lily dived into revision. Then, like a bolt from the blue, Alex got his letter for national service.
What? So soon?
Its the rules, Lily. Dont be sad. Ill finish and come back. Well get married. Promise youll wait?
She just held him tight.
At Alexs going-away do, Mary laughed the loudest, glancing at Lilys pale face and teasing, Oh, young love. You two cant even last a week apart! Lily didnt answer. She genuinely couldnt picture life without Alex.
Once he left, she kept busy by writing long letters, sharing every mishap and triumph: her struggles in the dissecting room, the garden shed planted on the exam circuit, the miserable mark on an anatomy test. Alex grinned at every story.
Then it just stopped. For a month, nothing. Then came the shortest, sharpest note: Alex was breaking up with her, no explanation; she should move on.
Mum, I dont understand!
That cant be it, love. Well go see for ourselves! Mrs Palmer booked train tickets at once.
The trip led to nothing. Alex refused even to come see her, sending word through his officer: Theres nothing more to say. Baffled, Lily left it alone. But Alex never came back from the North after his servicehe just disappeared, didnt even say goodbye to his parents. When Lily ran into Mrs Smythe on the street, the older woman shook her head.
I thought you were a good girl. How could you? And not another word, no matter how Lily begged.
Lily sobbed into her pillowsuch baseless accusations, such unfairness.
Darling! Mrs Palmer sat her upright, facing her square on. This isnt right, hear me?
What isnt?
All of it! If he did this and didnt even give you the decency of an explanation, then you mean nothing to him. Thats not real love, trust me. Think about it!
I cant. I dont know what to do. How do I go on?
Somehow, you will. I cant tell you how, just that you will. The hurt fades, I promise.
Cross your heart?
Have I ever lied to you?
Mum Lily buried her face in those familiar hands.
Lily and Mary only spoke now and thenmostly out of habit. Theyd meet for a coffee, chat about nothing, then walk off, already forgetting what was said. Mary was busy with romance; Lily was a bridesmaid at her wedding before even finishing medical school, where Mary, a bit tipsy, hugged her and muttered, Itll all work out for you too, Lily! Just watch!
It was clear as day to Lily what shed lost. She never got an answer about Alex, just assumed hed seen through her, and she all but erased him from her life. If colleagues eyed her in the surgical ward, she ignored it, blaming curiosity: not every day you see a curly-haired woman in cardiac surgery. Shoving her wild hair under her cap, she countlessly considered a short crop. Her career progressed slowly until one visiting professor from London took notice.
My dear, your hands! Rock steady, like a chaps, incredible!
Lily glowed. That was the greatest compliment.
Youre wasted here. You need to come with us, darling, he insisted.
Without hesitation, Lily accepted.
Lily, this is brilliant! What a chance! Mrs Palmer pranced around the flat, over the moon. Her girl, in one of the best hospitals in the country.
But Lily understood: her easy days were over. If it was tough back home, what would it be like in a top London clinic? She was right. When Artie, now a close family friend, came to visit, he was appalled.
Lily! You look awfulwhen was the last time you slept?
No idea! she laughed. Youre a doctor, Artie, dont be daft.
He fussed, shopped for groceries, cooked enormous shepherds pies, and Lily feasted until she groaned, Youre trying to fatten me up! I wont let you in next time!
Youll never keep me out, Artie smirked, producing a box of her favourite lemon tarts.
Hed tinker about, fix broken taps, sort her paperwork, service her car, and all without saying a word. Somehow, his quiet care became part of her life.
Mum, I feel guilty. He does everything for me. And I
And what, love? Mrs Palmer nuzzled into Lilys curls as she curled up on the kitchen chair, just like when she was little.
I just dont know.
Are you still comparing him to Alex?
Yeah. Its not the same.
Sometimes, love isnt all fireworks. Sometimes its gentle, and it takes a while to see it. Maybe you should stop looking behind for once and take a look forward. Tell me, honestlydo you love Artie?
I dont know Lily gazed at her mum. What even is love, Mum?
Oh, darling, if anyone knew that, wed all be sorted. I think everyone has their own version. For some, its wild; for some, its safe and calm. What do you want?
Lily paused. Peace, I think.
Well, theres your answer. Who gives you that?
Over the year, Lily kept catching herself studying Artie every time he visited.
Why are you staring at me?
I want to remember you. When you go, Ill need something to hold on to.
Want a picture? Artie teased as she wrestled another Yorkshire pudding off his plate.
Give me yourself instead, she heard herself say, surprising even herself. She watched as Artie froze, then turned to her and smiled from ear to ear.
Does this arrangement suit you? she asked, eyes twinkling.
With one look from him, she finally knew: this was exactly right.
A year and a half later, their son arrived, then a daughter two years on. Her parents moved to the city to help with the kids, and Lilyhanding the little ones over to her mumreturned to the theatre, now in the childrens wing of one of the best hospitals in England.
Dr Palmer, my girl, youre a gem! the professor would say, wagging his finger. When I retire to tend to my tomatoes, youll take over for me.
Dont go just yet, Profthe works never-ending!
You cant heal the whole world, but you can try, eh? Weve got a challenging case todaylets go!
As she walked the corridor, a woman flung herself at her, familiar and frantic.
You Lily
Mary stood frozen, inches away.
Mary! Lily reached out for a hug. What on earth are you doing here?
My son. Bobby Platton.
I see, Lily nodded. Im his surgeon.
Lily
Dont worry. Its a tricky op, but I promiseIll do everything I can.
Will it be alright? Marys voice shook.
We dont make promises like that, Mary. But Ill do my very best. Wait hereitll be a while. When Im done, Ill come find you.
Ill wait…
The surgery was a triumph. Lily, exhausted, slumped next to Mary, who was dozing on a hard plastic chair.
Mary! Lily prodded her awake.
Huh? Lily!?
All sorted. Operation went well. Now we just watch and wait.
Wait for what?
To see how he recovers. Bobbys a tough lad.
Mary sank onto the chair and burst into tears.
There you go again! Only letting it out once its alright. Come onlets get you some tea and a bite to eat. Ill be here a few more hours and Im famished.
But cant I see him?
Not yet. Once hes stable, youll be let in. And no blubbing, alright? Dont want him worrying.
I get it. Mary nodded.
Sitting in the canteen, Mary watched Lily tuck into a sandwich.
Youve always been such a greedy thing!
Youd be, too, eating nothing for a day, juggling two difficult cases and three operations in a row. Ive earned it.
You look different
How different?
A lot. I didnt recognise you at first. How are things?
Works great, as you can see. Ill introduce you to the family later. Where are you staying?
Mary fiddled with her paper napkin, avoiding Lilys gaze. Instead, she asked quietly, You married?
Yes. And my husbands a marvel. Remember Artie?
Sorry, no. But I do remember Alex
Mary, Alex is ancient history. Just a bright spot from my youth.
Lily I need to say sorry
What for? Lily sipped her tea, eyes curious.
I I took the letters out of your boxthe ones Alex sent you. I read them. I was just so jealous. Couldnt understand why he picked you, not
Not you? Lily tried not to laugh. I never knew either. I always figured Id never match up to you.
I wrote to him, told him youd found someone new and you were getting married Marys voice faded away.
Lily stirred her tea, thinking it over.
Im so sorry, Lily. Youre a really good person and I Then you go and save my son
Mary, calm down, will you? Lily fetched her a glass of water. Here, drink up. Still an emotional one, arent you? If the worlds not revolving around you, it might as well end. But did it ever occur to youyou did me a favour?
What? Mary looked up, startled.
Think about it. If he believed you that easily, was he really worth it? Did you know I went up north to see him?
No.
He refused to see me. Some love, that. And if you hadnt interfered, who knows where Id be now? No Artie, no kids Ive got two, by the way. And honestly? I dont regret a thing. Without what happened with Alex, I might never have known what real love is.
And whats that? Mary asked softly.
Its when every breath you take matters to someone else, and theirs to you. Like your lives are in sync. If one stops, so does the other.
Did you make that up?
No, my husband did. Hes the poet in the family.
He sounds wonderful.
He is! Now, lets go.
Where?
To see Bobby. Times up. Remember what I said?
Mary nodded, nearly sprinting out.
Slow down! Lily pressed the lift button, eyeing her old friend.
Outside the ward, fixing Marys dressing gown, Lily gave her a gentle shove and a reassuring smile:
In you go!Mary crept in, and Lily watched her disappear behind the door. She stood for a second, letting herself feel the odd shiver that always came at the end of something biga surgery, a confession, a healing, a reckoning. All of it winding together in this long, mad tapestry she called life.
She caught a glimpse of herself in the glassstill wild-haired, still unmistakably herself, lines around her eyes now, but bright ones, well-worn with laughter and tears.
Artie would be waiting with the children, and her mum would have baked pies and relayed the entire hospital shift to the cat by now. This, she realized, was her true rewardthe small, stubborn joys, all strung together, winding onward.
Lily pulled her coat tighter and stepped into the corridors steady hum, heart lighter than it had been in years. The tangled paths of envy, heartbreak, and old friendships had somehow led her here: her own kind of beauty, hard-won and fiercely tended.
On her way out, she paused at the nurses’ station, dropped off a thank-you note for the team, and plucked a spare hair tie from her pocket. She glanced at it, the bright, curly strand it snagged glinting in the fluorescent lights.
Smiling, she tucked it into her pocketa wild, springy reminder of the girl shed been, and the woman she had become. Then, with a steady step and a full heart, Lily went home.
