April 14
I told my husband he shouldnt turn up at my flat any more.
My sister wants a small wedding, just close family, no extras, Andrew muttered, leaning against the kitchen door. He pretended to rummage through the cupboard, but I could see his shoulders tremble as he shifted the same shirts from one peg to another.
You know Lucy, right? he continued, his voice low. Shes always well, shes a bit odd.
I nodded. Three years Ive been married to his brother, yet I still feel like the odd one out. As they say, crystal clear.
Andrew, I said calmly, lets drop the games. Your sister has invited everyone even that distant uncle you only saw at Granddads funeral, even Mrs. Valerie next door who looks after Mums roses when shes off to the country house. But she didnt invite me. Not your wife. Why?
What do you expect from me? he snapped, suddenly on edge. You want me to march over to Lucy and cause a scene? Its her wedding, after all! She can invite who she likes!
And I have a right to know why my husbands relatives act as if I dont exist!
Andrews face went slack. He slumped into the chair beside me, took my hand with his cold, damp fingers and began saying what I already knew. He spoke of his mothers belief that he could find someone better than me, of Lucys lingering hurt that I missed her birthday two years ago (I was ill with a fever, but who remembers that). He explained that their whole clan traditionally celebrates only within a tight circle Mum, Dad, him and Lucy and any outsider feels like a threat to their cosy little world.
What are you proposing? I asked when he finished. Should I spend my life waiting for your family to finally accept me?
Not a whole life, he tried to smile, maybe five years
Only five? I laughed. I thought Id be waiting fifty.
Andrew gave a shy grin and looked away.
Listen, Andy, I said, squeezing his hand, heres the deal, love. Either we both go to Lucys wedding together, or you stay away from it altogether.
Christine
Yes, Christine, I replied, looking him straight in the eye. Did you understand?
He nodded hastily, like a schoolboy, promising to talk to Lucy, to smooth everything over. He kept promising.
—
The two weeks leading up to the wedding were a strange tension. Andrew pretended everything was fine, but I watched his nerves spike. He bit his nailsa habit he never had beforehesitated when I spoke to him, and lingered in the bathroom with his phone for ages.
One evening I accidentally saw a text exchange between him and Lucy; he hadnt said a word to her at all.
Fine, I thought.
Three days before the big day I bought a dressan expensive, seagreen number that would make anyone stare. When Andrew saw it hanging on the rack, he stared at me, bewildered.
Why? he asked.
Because were going to Lucys wedding, remember? You said everything was settled, I replied sweetly, smiling. He fell silent, then tried to change the subject.
Alright then I muttered to myself, already knowing exactly what I would do.
—
The wedding morning I rose early, made breakfast, set the table and even arranged fresh flowers. Earlier Lucy had sent me a bunch of white roses, perhaps an attempt to smooth over his upcoming guilt. I poured a cup of tea and settled down to drink.
Soon Andrew shuffled into the kitchen, hair loose, robe on, scrolling through his phone. He actually seemed pleased to see me.
Are are you not coming? he asked cautiously.
And you? I replied calmly.
He stiffened, realizing my trap, but still halfasleep couldnt work out his next move.
Sit down, breakfast is getting cold, I offered.
He dropped into the chair opposite me and started:
Christine, Ive been thinking maybe I should just go alone? Just show up for the ceremony and leave straight away. Its my sisters wedding; I cant simply not be there.
I set my cup down gently.
Of course you cant, I said, putting as much warmth into my voice as possible. Its your sister. Get ready, or youll be late.
He planted a quick kiss on my cheek, dashed to the shower, then began rummaging through the flat in a frantic search.
Where are my cufflinks? My tie? My shoes? he kept popping up, the whole scene almost comedic. I watched with an amused smile. When he finally stood, all dressed, at the door, I whispered:
Please leave the flat keys on the hall table.
What? he asked, confused.
The house keys. Leave them there. You can collect your things later. Ill tidy them up.
The apartment fell eerily silent; even the ticking of the big wall clock seemed to pause. Andrew stood in the doorway, looking festive yet utterly lost.
Christine he began, voice cracking. You cant be serious.
I am very serious, I replied. You made your choice, Andy, and Ive accepted it. Go to your sisters wedding, have a good time, but dont come back.
But thats ridiculous! he protested. Because of a wedding you want me to?
Its not about the wedding, I said. Its about you never trying to do anything for me. You pretended wed sorted it, hoping Id back out at the last minute. As always.
Christine, stop he tried to smile. Why are you making a mountain out of a molehill? Youve never been a drama queen.
Andrew, I asked sharply, do you really not understand, or are you just pretending? Your family never accepts me. For three years now theyve made it clear Im an unwanted extra in your cosy little circle. And you have you done anything to change that?
He hesitated. I I talked with Mum
And what did you say? Please, accept my wife, shes good, truly good.
Christine he started to approach, but I stepped back.
You promised to speak to Lucy, to sort things out, yet you never did, did you?
He flushed, eyes dropping.
Go on, Andrew, give my regards to Lucy.
Do you want me to stay? he asked, making a final plea.
And you want to stay with me? I countered. Can you defy your family and skip the celebration? When the flood of calls comes, will you tell them youre only coming with me?
After a brief pause he murmured, Its awkward.
Then go, if its awkward for you. And dont come back to my flat, I said firmly. This is my home, and I have the right to ask you out. You value your parents and sister more than your wife. So why should we keep living together?
