THE GIFT OF FORESIGHT
I never wanted this child, but Mum said, Have her, darling. Shell be your salvation and cure for despair.
Emily, are you expecting? Mum asked, her voice gentle but certain.
How could she have known? Id only found out myself that morning! The used test was impossible for her to discover I tossed it immediately, emptied the bin outside, not a trace left behind.
How do you know?
I just do. Youre my daughter. Mums eyes softened.
I didnt really understand what she meant, nor did I try. It wasnt important at the time. All I wished for was to fall asleep and wake up five months ago, before meeting Thomas. If only I could just turn back the clock!
So youve broken up with Thomas?
Once again, Mums intuition was uncanny.
Two weeks ago, Thomas asked to meet at the coffee shop. I thought it was a date, but it turned out to be a farewell. Im sorry, Emily, but well, thank you for everything. Please, dont call anymore. Youll only hurt yourself and me, but nothing will change Honestly, its kinder to cut things quickly like ripping off a plaster. He stood up and left, and I just sat there, numb, feeling like a poor dog whose tail had been chopped off my love, gone in a single, merciful stroke. That kindness didnt make it hurt any less.
And now this unwanted pregnancy, lingering like an unspoken secret.
Yes, Mum, we broke up my voice trembled, betraying me. Please, dont say anything. I know what youll say. That you warned me, and I didnt listen Yes, you did warn me Thomas was selfish and a bit of a womaniser, and I didnt heed your advice. Are you satisfied?
How could I be satisfied when my daughters hurting? Mum soothed me, stroking my hair like she used to when I was a child. When are you due?
Never. I dont want a baby!
Emily, my precious girl When your father passed away, I was beside myself I survived only because of you. When Im gone, she Mum gently touched my flat stomach, not my head will be your cure for despair
I was too wrapped up in my own troubles to notice Mums odd phrase, when Im gone, but I caught onto the word she.
How do you know its a girl and not a boy?
I just know Mum didnt elaborate. She pleaded softly Please, Emily, have her. And remember: whatever happens, my spirit will always be beside you.
On the evening of May 6th, an ambulance rushed me to St. Marys Maternity Hospital with labour pains. By the morning of the 7th, I had a little girl. That afternoon, our neighbour, Auntie June, arrived with dreadful news: my mother had passed away. After sending me off to the hospital, Mum had called an ambulance for herself. A few hours later, the hospital rang Auntie June.
She left your number. Massive heart attack. There was nothing we could do.
I barely remember the funeral Auntie June and other neighbours handled the arrangements. Weeks later, sorting papers, I noticed something uncanny: both the birth certificate and Mums death notice held not only the same date, but the same time 6:30.
Charlotte was born at the very moment my mother passed away.
Coincidence? Something mystical? I recalled Mums words: When Im gone But she never complained about her heart. Did Mum have the gift of foresight and sense her own end?
Little Charlotte became my rescue and balm for despair. When she was three and a half, I took her with me to the cemetery for the first time.
Were visiting Granny Susan I explained gently. These flowers are for her. Lets put them in this vase.
Charlotte looked around curiously, then called out:
Granny, where are you? Are you hiding?
Grannys not hiding, darling, she lives up in the sky now. She cant speak to us, but
She can see us, right? Charlotte finished my sentence for me.
Yes, she can. She watches over and protects us
As we left, Charlotte tipped her head back and waved at a drifting cloud:
Granny, dont be lonely. Well come see you again!
My mum isnt here anymore, but I feel her presence every day, invisible but steadfast. Like a guardian angel, she shields Charlotte and me from sorrow.
Now my daughter is seven, and theres no one in the world I love more than her. All our friends insist that Charlotte is the spitting image of her grandmother. I readily agree they truly look alike but lately Ive noticed Charlotte has a gift: foresight. She predicts the weather, guests arrivals, and the disappearance of belongings with uncanny accuracy. Yesterday, she completely caught me off guard:
Soon, Ill have a Daddy She paused, then added: Dont worry, Granny will like him.
