A Child as a Bargaining Chip
Shes forbidden me from seeing Lily again. Can you imagine?
James flung his keys onto the sideboard with a clatter and leaned heavily against the doorframe. His face was ashen and weary, as though he’d been hauling sacks at the docks all day rather than toiling away at the office.
Emma dog-eared her place in her book and tucked her feet beneath her on the sofa, making room for him beside her. The sight of him so worn down pinched her heart uncomfortably.
What is it this time? she asked gently.
Said if Im so stingy, I wont see my daughter, James muttered, tearing off his tie and slinging it over the arm of the chair. She didnt let me call for a fortnight, and now today shes blocked me everywhere.
Emma heaved a slow sigh. The court had set maintenance at two hundred pounds a month, and James never once quibbled when it came to providing for Lilys real needs. New winter shoes? Of course. Extra lessons at school? Absolutely. But Claire was never satisfied.
Let me guess, Emma patted the space next to her, she suddenly needs money for something terribly urgent and important?
James collapsed onto the sofa, head tilted back in exhaustion.
For a beauticians course, would you believe. Says she wants to start earning. Asked me for three hundred quid.
And shes never thought of working the regular way, I suppose? An actual job, no fancy courses or constant investments?
James gave her a weary look. You know what shes like.
She did. In the three years since theyd been together, Claire had declared perhaps a dozen grand plans for self-fulfilment. Nail artistry, flower arranging, get rich online challengesthe lot. None lasted more than a fortnight, yet every new whim meant squeezing funds from her ex-husband.
Its always the same trick, Emma laced her fingers through his. She needs moneyshe keeps Lily away. You pay upshe lets you see her. Pure blackmail.
I cant just stop paying. Shes my daughter.
I know. But Claire knows it too. And shes using it.
James was silent, the muscle in his cheek twitching with bottled frustration. He hated thishated how powerless he was, but his love for Lily always won over common sense.
One Saturday morning, the doorbell rang. Emma opened the door to find Lilysmall, fair-haired, her wide blue eyes brimming with tears. The lift rumbled; Claire was already making her escape.
Hello, love, whats happened? Emma crouched to meet the girls gaze.
Lily sniffed, slipping past her into the hall without a word of greeting. James hurried from the kitchen, drying his hands on a tea towel.
Lily! My princess!
He swept up his daughter, but she wriggled free and stepped back.
Daddy, you dont love Mummy anymore!
James froze in shock.
Who told you such a thing?
Mummy was crying! She said you left her, that shes all alone now and so sad!
Emma bit her lip. No five-year-old made such solemn pronouncements on her own. Those were grown-up words, planted there with experienced hands.
Listen, darling, James crouched in front of Lily, Mummy and Daddy just dont live together any more. Grown-ups sometimes drift apart. But I love you with all my heart, do you understand?
No! Lily stamped her foot. Mummy says youre mean! If youre not kind to her, I shant come to see you again!
Emma turned to the window, clenching her fists. Using your own child as a weaponit was so low, so vile, she was tempted to ring Claire and tell her as much. But it would do no good.
James did his best all day to cheer Lily up. They watched cartoons, built towers out of bricks, baked shortbread biscuits together. By evening, Lily thawed enough to let Emma plait her hair. Yet the shadow of Claires words hung over them all, poisoning every moment.
On Sunday, James took Lily back home. Emma kept herself busy in the kitchen, eyes drawn often to the clock. An hour, then more. It was two hours before the door finally banged.
She peeked into the hallway. James stood there, his forehead pressed to the wall, breathing heavily.
Whats she after now?
Five hundred pounds. For new clothes. For herself.
Emma sat heavily onto the stool.
And?
I refused. She started bawlingright in front of Lily. Lily began to cry too. Daddy, help Mummy! Dont be mean! James slid to the floor. I gave her the money. I only wanted my little girl to stop crying.
There was nothing to be said. Claire had found the perfect lever, and wielded it without mercy.
The same story repeated the next month. This time, money for a seaside holiday. Lily dreams of the sea and her poor mummy cant afford to take her! James paid up, though he knew full well Claire would ship Lily off to her grandmothers and go off holidaying alone.
Another monthmoney for manicures and pedicures. I need to look proper when I drop your daughter at nursery! Again, tears, a childs tantrum, another envelope of cash passed over with a shaky hand. That day, Claire came storming into their flat without so much as knocking.
Ive had enough of begging! I need an extra five hundred a month. Just send it, and all will be well.
James stood in the hallway, arms folded.
No.
What do you mean, no? You have plenty!
I do. But I wont spend it on your whims. I pay maintenance, and buy whatever Lily needs besides. The rest is your concern, not mine.
Claire shrieked and turned on Emma, who was standing quietly in the kitchen doorway.
Its your fault! Youve poisoned him! You stole him, and now
Claire, enough. James cut in. You were the one having flings during our marriage. I left you six months before I met Emma. The divorce was already underway.
I would have won you back! If it hadnt been for her!
She lunged at Emma, eyes blazing. James grabbed Claire by the wrist and hauled her back.
Completely lost your senses? he snapped. One more move and Ill call the police.
Claire wrenched her hand free, hissing,
You wouldnt dare!
I would. And if you dont stop this circus, Ill quit my job. Youll get the legal minimum. No more handouts.
You wouldnt. You love Lily too much.
I do. But Ill let myself be the bad dad for a while if thats what it takes for you to learn your tricks arent working now. Ive had enough, Claire. Enough of your nails and frocks, your courses you quit in a week. Ive had enough of watching you use our daughter as a pawn.
Claires face turned white. It was money alone that mattered to hera fact James suddenly wielded as his own weapon.
Youll answer for this, she spat, retreating to the door. Both of you will!
The door slammed behind her. Emma exhaled slowly.
Do you think itll work?
No idea. But we had to try.
It worked. For months after, Claire was astonishingly quiet. She handed Lily over without fuss, never demanded more than the monthly maintenance, sometimes even answered Jamess texts about Lilys health. Emma dared to hope, treading carefully, not wanting to spook this fragile peace.
Then Claire found herself a new man. Some businessman from up north, if the photos on her social media were to be believedrestaurants, bouquets, trips out. One evening the phone rang unexpectedly.
James, Im moving, declared Claire, brisk as ever. Peters asked me to join him. Were getting married. Lily will stay with you.
James nearly dropped the receiver.
What do you mean shell stay with me?
Exactly what I said. I have a new life to arrange. A child in tow would only get in the way.
Emma, whod overheard every word, pressed a hand to her mouth. So simpleher own child, traded away when a better offer appeared.
A week later, Claire dropped Lily at their door, suitcase in one hand, giant teddy in the other.
Goodbye, sweetheart. Mummy will ring you.
She never did.
James never once mentioned maintenance. I want nothing more to do with her, he confided to Emma. Were comfortable. Every penny she sent would just remind me how much weve endured.
Emma agreed.
Lily adjusted slowly. The first few weeks she asked for her mother, wept in the night, refused to eat. In time, she began to settle. Emma never tried to replace her mother; she was simply therereading stories, braiding hair, teaching her to bake.
One evening, as she tucked the child into bed, Lily whispered,
Emma, do you love me?
With all my heart, darling.
Like Mummy does?
Emma paused, searching for the words.
In a different way. But not a bit less.
Lily nodded, as if that answer made all the sense in the world, and closed her eyes.
Emma slipped into the hall and found James leaning against the wall, a soft smile on his lips.
Thank you, he murmured.
For what?
For everything. For your patience. For not walking away when things were hard. For loving her.
Emma wrapped her arms around his waist.
We did it.
We did, he said, burying his face in her hair. At last, everythings all right.
Outside, the last of the sun was slipping away. The flat was full of the scent of fresh biscuits and childrens shampoo. From Lilys room there wasnt a peepthe child was fast asleep, hugging her teddy tight.
They were, at last, a true family.
