Last month was my sons birthday. I told him Id drop by as a guest.
I raised three boys. Anyone whos lived with four men in the house will know exactly what I mean. I cant fathom how a home can have no dinner ready, or things strewn about everywhere. Now, at 52, Ive always believed a woman should create a comfortable, safe home for her husband to return to. But I dont think my daughter-in-law shares that view.
My eldest son decided to marry two years ago, and nine months later, they had a daughter. He was 28; his wife, Emily, was just 20. She was still at university, but the eight-year age gap didnt seem to bother my son.
While Emily was pregnant, she was impossiblealways sending my son out for one thing after another. First apples in the morning, then an orange, then flowers. He never argued, just did as she asked. We all thought things would change after the baby arrived, but they didnt.
She breastfed for two monthsthat was it. Then she told my son she was exhausted from sleepless nights and needed a break. Hes always been patient and kind, so he asked me to step in. Of course, I couldnt refuse.
While I looked after the baby, Emily spent her days at spas and shops, coming home too tired to even cook dinner for my son after work. In the end, I stayed a full week caring for their daughter. She got used to sleeping till noon, living entirely on her own terms, leaving everything to me.
After a month, I cracked and said I had to go home. Emily was furious. I knew she wasnt ready to manage on her own, so I visited occasionally, but what I saw upset memess everywhere, an empty fridge.
She couldnt even be bothered to cook for her own child. Having raised three sons myself, I found her attitude unbearable. My son always had home-cooked meals growing up. Last month, for his birthday, I thought Id visit, assuming Emily would prepare something. Instead, she ordered pizza and sushi.
I dont understand why my son puts up with this. Maybe because they didnt live together before marryinghe never saw her true self until it was too late. Its clearly hard for him, yet he stays silent.
I keep thinking of ways to make her step up as a wife and mother. My only worry is upsetting my son. I know I should support his choices, but I cant just stand by and watch. Are all daughters-in-law like this?
What would you advise in this situation? Should I speak to Emily myself?
