We live in a house in the countryside. My daughter, Bethany, is ten years old and has plenty of friends. Her closest companion is Emily, our next-door neighbour. Theyve been inseparable for as long as I can remember, but lately, I find myself growing uncomfortable with their friendship.
Bethany is naturally gentle and easy-going; she values friendships deeply and will do almost anything shes asked. Shes kind-hearted, always ready to share what she has. Emily, on the other hand, is a completely different sort. Shes wilful, frequently dragging Bethany into all sorts of mischief. She persuades her to roam far from home or to tag along with older children in the neighbourhood.
Emilys family is quite ordinary, but they dont seem to pay her much attention. Shes left to her own devices for most of the day. More often than not, shes at ours, either out walking with Bethany or spending time inside. Its become a real source of stress for me. Almost every evening, someone elses child is in my home. After school, they both come straight here, do their homework together, then either play or go wandering around the village. That would all be bearable, except for one thing I always end up feeding Emily.
When its time for tea, I call Bethany to the kitchen, but Emily turns up with her. She doesnt hesitate she eats whatever is offered, from soup and the main course to thick slices of bread, and inevitably asks for a cup of tea and some biscuits afterwards. Its not that I dont feel sympathy for her, but were not well-off enough to keep feeding someone elses child every day.
Ive tried calling just Bethany to the table and asking Emily to wait in the lounge, but she starts pleading. Im famished, could I at least have a bit of soup or some bread? I cant bring myself to deny a hungry child and always end up giving in.
Ive also made attempts to send Emily home for her tea. Pop back to your house and let your mum feed you. But she always has an excuse: her mother isnt home, they’ve run out of food, or her mum hasnt cooked. I can’t exactly throw another child out of the house.
Recently, I decided to have a word with her mum. This whole thing was really beginning to annoy me, and I politely asked if she could take care of Emilys meals herself. She was furious: Are you begrudging a bowl of soup? Were neighbours! If your daughter came round here, Id feed her too and wouldnt say a word!
The funny thing is, the girls spend nearly all their time at ours, not theirs.
Either way, all of this is about to sort itself out, as were planning to move soon. The brazen neighbour and her daughter will have to manage without their free dinners. Still, I can’t help but wonder how someones meant to handle this sort of problem.
If Ive learnt anything from this experience, its that generosity can sometimes blur the line between kindness and being taken advantage of. I need to find a way to help without letting people walk all over us.
