I was allowed to choose which parent to live with. Two years later, I regretted my decision.
I always thought my dad loved me more than my mum did. He spoiled me; she scolded me. He was the peacemaker; she was quicker to argue. So when I found out they were divorcing, I was almost relieved. At thirteen, I had no interest in staying with my mother, and besides, I figured Dadbeing the breadwinnercould look after me better. They asked for my opinion. Mum hoped Id pick her, but she wasnt the least bit surprised when I chose Dad.
A year after we moved out, Dad found himself a new girlfriend. She was around the same age as Mum, and he was smitten. She was polite enough to me, but there was none of the warmth or love Mum had shown. When she and Dad had a baby girl together, it was like they forgot I existed. Sometimes theyd go off on little trips as a trio, not even considering me, or theyd throw fancy dinners when I wasnt around. My room now had a cot in it, and peaceful sleep became a distant memorywhat with the midnight wailing, the sudden lights flicking on for feeds
Dad couldnt have cared less how it affected my mood or my schoolwork. He didnt even bat an eyelid when I started staying out late with friends. Eventually, I realised this couldnt go on. I had university plans, ambitionsand if I kept losing sleep, none of it would happen. So, swallowing my pride, I called Mum.
“Can I come over?” I asked, not daring to hope. I rarely phoned her, let alone visited.
“Of course, love. Stay as long as you like. Your sisters giving you grief, isnt she?”
I felt sorry for her. Dad had his shiny new family and his distractions, but Mum was still completely alone.
I asked Dad if I could move in with Mum temporarily, and he agreed on the spot. Promised to send money, then barely called. Honestly, it was easier for everyone. Maybe because Im older now, but Mum and I get on like mates. She looks after me, fusses over mewhereas Dad treats me like Im already grown, except Mum still insists on cooking me dinner after work like Im twelve.
If I could go back, Id probably choose to stay with her. But then again, whos to say I wouldnt have regretted that just as much? Grass is always greener, and all that.
