Last month was my sons birthday, and I told him I would come as a guest.
I raised three boys. Anyone who has four men living under one roof knows exactly what I mean. I cant understand how a house can lack a prepared lunch or dinner, or have items strewn about everywhere. At 52 I have always believed a woman should create a home that is comfortable and safe for the man who returns to it. I doubt my daughterinlaw thinks the same way.
My eldest son decided to get married two years ago, and nine months later they welcomed a daughter. He was 28 at the time, his wife 20. Victoria was still a student, and even the eightyear age gap didnt seem to frighten my son.
When she was pregnant, my daughterinlaw had a very difficult temperament, constantly sending my son to the store. One morning she wanted apples, then oranges, then flowers. He never argued and always obliged. We thought everything would change after the baby arrived, but it didnt.
She gave birth, breastfed for two months, and that was all. Then she told my son she was exhausted from sleepless nights and needed a break. My son, a compassionate and understanding man, asked me to sit with her. Of course I couldnt refuse.
While I cared for the child, she spent the whole day in various salons, and when she came home she didnt even bother to cook dinner for my son returning from work. Consequently I spent an entire week with their daughter. She got used to sleeping until noon and living entirely according to her own preferences, leaving everything to me.
After a month I broke down and said I had to go back home. She was angry. I realized Victoria was still not independent, so I visited them occasionally, but I disliked what I saw the house was chaotic and the fridge was empty.
She was too lazy to even cook for her own child. I raised three sons, so such irresponsibility was unacceptable to me. My son always ate at home. Last month was his birthday, and I decided to visit, assuming his wife would cook something. Instead she ordered pizza and sushi.
I cant understand why my son chose such a wife and tolerates this behavior. Perhaps because they didnt live together before marriage and he never saw her true nature. It seems hard for him, yet he remains silent and says nothing to his wife.
Im looking for a way to make her finally act like a wife and mother. I fear my son will be offended by me. I know I should support his choice, but I cant just stand by and watch. Are all daughtersinlaw like this?
What would you advise a woman in this situation? Should she talk to her daughterinlaw?
