In Search of Perfection
Victor settled himself at a small round table in a cosy café near the heart of London. But he barely took in the warm surroundsthe only thing that held his attention was the café door. Every so often, he glanced at his watch, then back to the entrance, waiting for Lisa.
Each new woman who crossed the threshold made his pulse quicken. A lady in a striking red coatit wasnt her. Next, a petite brunette lugging a large bagstill not Lisa. Victor found himself mentally constructing possible reasons for her lateness. Was she simply in the habit of arriving late for dates? Many women do it to create a hint of intrigue, to spark a mans interest. But if Lisa thought her delay would have that effect, she was mistaken. Victor wasnt one to wait around forever. Hed made up his mind: five more minutes, and hed leave. Waiting any longer was absolutely against his principles.
Minutes dragged on. Victor was already beginning to bid this evening farewell in his mind when a melodic voice behind him drew his attention:
Hi! Sorry Im late!
He turned and saw a tall, slender blonde, flashing a charming smile as she took the seat across from him. Her hair was perfectly styled, a carefree lightness shining in her eyes.
Hope I didnt keep you waiting too long? she added, tilting her head slightly.
Victor paused, staring at her, trying to align the real-life Lisa with the photo hed seen.
Lisa? he uttered, clear doubt in his voice as he scrutinised her face. Is that really you? You lookwell, youre not quite the woman in the photo! Almost a different person.
She gave a light, untroubled laugh, clearly finding the situation amusing.
Yes, its me, she confirmed, flashing an even brighter smile at Victors bewilderment. And, before you askthe photo really was me. It was taken four years ago, though. Ive changed a lot, havent I?
There was a proud lilt in her voice, as if she expected to be congratulated on the transformation. She was supremely confident hed appreciate the surprise.
She was wrong
Thats putting it mildly, Victor replied, keeping his tone level. Too much, in fact! And not for the better, he thought.
Lisa cocked her head, lazily looping a strand of long hair around her finger, making the gesture playfully coy.
I bet youre glad I turned out far more attractive than I was in the photo, she said flirtatiously, her eyes narrowing a moment. I did it on purpose. Tons of men have messaged me saying they adore my current look Four years ago, no one even noticed me!
She pouted for effect, as though expecting him to reassure her, to tell her how pretty she was now, how thrilled he was by her appearance. But Victor stubbornly withheld any such praise, which seemed to rattle Lisa a bit.
Lisa had done her homework before agreeing to meet. Shed scrolled through his profile, read his bio, checked his social media. Everything checked outhe really did hold a top job at a major firm, owned a two-storey home in a posh Surrey village not far from central London, and drove two expensive cars. It was all quite impressive, like something from a glossy magazine. Lisa couldnt understand why a man with such success would bother with online dating. It hardly mattered, though. What counted was not letting such a catch slip away.
Meanwhile, Victors thoughts were elsewhere. He checked his watch, rehearsing the moment he could gracefully make his exit. Each slow-moving minute felt unnecessary. He tried to focus on conversation, nodded at the right moments, but all the while, he only grew more certainthis girl just wasnt for him.
There was nothing about this Lisa that attracted him. The face on the website photothough not exactly a supermodelhad seemed more genuine, more real. The woman in front of him, though stylish and self-assured, just felt artificial. Her manners, her voice, even her smilethey all felt like a performance.
Another glance at his watch. Just a few more minutes of polite chatting, then hed excuse himself for a work emergency. He was already planning the phrase, determined to be kind but not linger a moment longer than necessary.
Victor couldnt help but recall that photographthe one that made him click start conversation in the first place. What had caught his eye back then? The figure. On the photo, Lisa had just the sort of curves he found attractivesoft, feminine, alluring. He could remember lingering over the picture, thinking, Yesfinally, something special.
Now, a completely different woman sat before himslender, almost spindly, like the barest wisp beneath her oversized jumper. Victor did his best to hide his disappointment. But inwardly he was baffled: why do women chase thinness so aggressively, discarding what nature gave them? Who convinced them that looking like skin stretched over bone is the ideal of beauty? He saw no charm or femininity in this race for skinniness.
They talked for about ten more minutes, mostly Lisa sharing details about her hobbies and future plans. Victor only half-listened, inserting polite comments now and then. In his head, the plan was clear: as soon as the conversation dried up, hed offer her a lift home, blaming a pressing call from work. Thankfully, it wasnt a liethere genuinely was an unsolved issue waiting for him at the office.
At the right moment, Victor offered:
Shall I give you a lift home? Ive got an important meeting in an hour, but I can easily drop you off on the way.
Lisa paused, a flicker of annoyance on her face, but she quickly composed herself and nodded.
Yes, thank you.
They barely spoke on the drive. Victor concentrated on the road. Lisa looked out the window, casting side-long glances as if trying to figure out where things had gone wrong. Just before she got out, she turned to him and said:
Will you message me tonight? Maybe we could arrange another date?
Of course, Ill be in touch. Lets speak later, Victor smiled, though it was a little forced, already certain there would be no follow-up. There was no point in pretending otherwise.
Lisa lingered a moment at the door, hoping forsomething. Victor only nodded, wished her a pleasant evening, and drove away.
That same evening, Victor deleted his dating profile and blocked Lisas number. No doubts, no what-ifs. There was no intention of seeing her again. The matter had been clear from the very starthe was simply too well-mannered to abandon a woman in the middle of a date.
********************
Victor sat at a café table with a colleague, a hearty ribeye and crispy chips before himexactly to his taste. He ate slowly, idly eyeing other customers, especially the womenalmost all of whom were painstakingly picking at salads or other healthy, low-calorie dishes.
Why do women constantly punish themselves with diets? Victor sighed, nudging a chip away with his fork. They deny themselves so many pleasures! I meanlook at thatwould you call that food? he nodded at a woman nearby, meticulously forking spinach leaves into her mouth. No joy there, just calorie counting.
His colleague smirked. Hed long since grown familiar with Victors views.
Because most men prefer slim women, he shrugged, sipping his coffee. Youre the exceptionlook, for instance, that pretty girl at the far table has been eyeing you for a good half hour now. Maybe you should give her a chance.
He nodded slightly at a slender brunette who was indeed glancing over now and then, pretending to study the menu.
Victor didnt even bother to look. His expression remained indifferent; his voice was cool:
I appreciate your opinion, but its none of my concern. Please dont meddle in my private life just as I dont in yours.
His colleague raised an eyebrow but didnt back down.
Do you even have a private life anymore? he teased, mock-seriously. Its all just work and your hobbies now, isnt it?
Victor put down his fork and levelled a hard look at his friend.
All right, none of my business, sorry, the man relented, raising his hands in mock defeat. Just trying to help.
Victor said nothing. He simply continued his meal. Truth be told, it had been a while since hed had anything resembling a private life. A year before, he split with a woman hed seriously considered marrying. Her name had been Molly kind, gentle, nurturing Molly. And, most importantly for Victor, she had that same ideal figuresoftly rounded, feminine, with curves in all the right places.
Their relationship had developed steadily and confidently. Victor never hesitated to spend on hershowing affection through gestures meant a great deal to him. He brought her flowers every day, surprised her with little gifts he hoped would brighten her week. He delighted in watching her reactiona sparkle in her eyes at something new or unexpected.
Mollys wardrobe occupied a whole room in his house, constantly replenished with new dresses, skirts, blouses, shoes. She hardly ever wore the same thing twiceshe loved feeling different, trying on fresh looks, pleasing both herself and Victor with a new outfit. He only encouraged thishe loved to see her looking elegant and radiant.
Victor showered Molly with compliments. He was always telling her how beautiful she looked, how perfectly a new dress suited her, how she could light up a room even in an old jumper. He wanted her to feel seen and cherished and to know he appreciated her.
And then things began to shift. Molly started spending more time with her friendsmeeting up in cafés, going to the cinema, wandering the shops. Each time, subtle, but unmistakable, changes crept into her behaviour.
One evening, Victor came home to find Molly in front of the mirror, peering at her side-on reflection with anxious intensity.
Im fat! she declared dramatically as soon as he walked in. I have to get in shape, or Ill be mortified on the beach!
Victor nearly choked at the words. He paused, trying to find the right response.
Molls, what do you mean? You look wonderful. Youve nothing to worry about.
You just dont see it! she exclaimed. Look at me! Everythings out of place, all wrong! My friends say its all about slimness and strength these days. If I dont shape up, Ill look likelike she struggled for the words, like something out of a fashion disaster!
Victor stepped close, gently taking her hands in his.
Your friends are wrong. Youre perfect just as you are. I love your shape, your laughter, your smile. Theres nothing Id change.
But Molly wasnt having any of it. The seed had taken root: to remain attractive, shed have to fit a certain standard. And that was the beginning of the end.
You have an amazing body, Victor insisted, trying to dissuade her. Youre gorgeousother women cant compare!
Molly sniffled, tears welling up. She turned to the window, tightly clutching the tablecloth.
Dont try to cheer me up, she said shakily. You should have sent me straight to the gym as soon as I started letting myself go! Surely you must have noticed?
Victor stepped closer, laying a hand on her shoulder.
Youre perfect to me! he said, voice thick with feeling. Dont listen to anyone else, theyre just jealous!
Sure they are! Molly snapped, pulling away, her expression wounded. You just cant bring yourself to say what you really think. Everyone notices, except you…
After that, everything changed. Molly was determined to transform. She cut out anything sugary, starchy, or fatty. The fridge filled with containers of poached chicken breast, steamed broccoli, and low-fat cottage cheese. Every morning started with a weigh-in and rigorous calorie counting.
As time went on, changes went deeper than just her diet. Molly became irritable, edgy. Old jokes and warm conversations were replaced by curt remarks. If Victor dared to pay her a compliment, she would shut him down at once:
Spare me the flatteryjust tell me the truth!
He tried to explain he was sincere, but Molly was obsessedher mind fixed solely on becoming ideal. She cycled through a dozen diets, each week changing the rules. Carbs were cut, then raw food only; some days just water.
Victor watched, worried. He remembered when Molly used to laugh and eat heartily. Now she picked at food, counted every last calorie, and his favourite steaks and home-baked pies were out of the question.
One tense evening, Victor came home to find Molly pacing the kitchen.
Whats up? he asked, cautious.
She spun around, eyes blazing.
Its your fault! she burst out. I cant do it because of you!
What are you on about? Victor was nonplussed.
You always order fatty food for dinner! she accused. You know Im on a diet, but you cant stop yourself from tempting me!
I want to eat real food too! Why should I live on your rabbit food?
His words only added fuel to the fire. Molly launched into a list of grievancesnot supporting her, not realising how hard it was, his bad influence.
Victor listened, heavy with exhaustion. Truthfully, in his eyes, she was as lovely as ever. But this diet-obsessed, anxious woman saw him only as a roadblock to some mythical perfection.
He gazed at the furious woman before him, struggling to believe she was the same Molly hed fallen for. Just months ago, shed smiled at him so warmly, laughed at his jokes, tucked into meals with gusto without a second thought. Now, all he saw was tension, sharp gestures, fiery eyes.
Where had his angel gone? That gentle, considerate, joyful woman who found delight in small things and could laugh contagiously?
What lay ahead? The question beat in his head, but the answer wouldnt come. To go on as things were meant rehashing the same argument, again and again, trying to prove what she refused to accept. Adjusting himself to fit her new standards? Hed lose himself entirely. Living with someone who doubted his every word, saw him only as an obstacle? It was unbearable.
So it came to an end. Victor hesitated for a long while, searching desperately for solutions, but each conversation descended into another row. In the end, he understood: these werent a relationship, just mutual misery. No trust, no joy, no understanding.
The decision was agony. He remembered all the good timestheir first dates, trips together, quiet evenings in. But the truth was inescapable; the current Molly, obsessed with a perfect figure, held no appeal for himnot just on the outside, but in her changed personality and attitude. The old Molly was gone, and she wasnt coming back.
The final quarrel did ita storm of angry words, a slammed door, and that was that. Victor was left alone in his empty flat, haunted by her perfume, their photos on the shelf, her clothes in the wardrobe
The first weeks after the break-up were the hardest. Hed catch himself reaching for the phone, stopping at the last moment. Sometimes hed doubt himself, wonder if hed thrown it all away too easily. But memories of those last, tense monthsendless quarrels, failing to connectreminded him there was no return.
Six months later, sick of going in circles, Victor did something hed once scoffed atsigned up for a dating website. He wasnt hoping for a miracle, just someone to talk to, to feel less alone.
He studied profiles carefully, read the blurbs, scrutinised photos. Some women seemed too serious, others too flighty. Some looked like Molly used to, but conversation proved there was no spark. Others were open, even lively, but still something was missing.
It was hopeless. He went on dates, kept up polite conversation, but felt empty inside. None of them kindled the warmth or interest his first meetings with Molly had sparked. Victor knew the problem wasnt them. It was him. Hed yet to let go of the past, still haunted by memories of happier times that now seemed like another life.
********************
Gradually, Victors days settled into a new routine. The past lingered, but he tried to focus on work, filling evenings with friends or favourite hobbies.
Then, one day, fortune caught him unawares. Victor popped into a small café near his London office for a coffee to go. At the next table, a woman sat jotting into a notebook, occasionally raising her eyes to survey the room before returning to her scribbles.
Something in her manner caught Victors attentiona quiet confidence, a natural ease. She didnt check her reflection, didnt fuss about crumbs, simply relished her coffee and her work. When their eyes met, she smiled openly, without a hint of embarrassment.
On impulse, Victor approached.
Excuse me, you seemed engrossed in writing. Is that a journal or work notes? he asked, striving for lightness.
A bit of both, she replied, setting down her pen. Im drafting a post for my blog. And you? Work nearby?
They clicked instantly. She introduced herself as Victoria. She worked as a modelbut not in the conventional sense. Victoria appeared in catalogues for plus-size womens fashion. Her face and figure regularly featured in a popular online shop specialising in stylish, comfortable clothing for those who didnt buy into skinny ideals.
What truly struck Victor was how much Victoria loved herself exactly as she was. She spoke about it with naturalness and grace.
I think diets are mostly a waste of time, a sign of poor self-esteem, she told him over lunch one day, after he gingerly asked how she stayed so upbeat. Of course, if its for medical reasons, fair enough. But torturing yourself for some number on the scales or to please others Not for me. I love good food, love being active, love my job. And I like how I look.
Her words were simple, yet so persuasive, that Victor found himself grinning. He hadnt met anyone so at peace with themselves in ages.
They started seeing each other more often. Victoria didnt demand lavish gifts, didnt pick fights, nor seek out reasons to be offended. Conversation flowed easily, but silence was comfortable too. She never tried to change him or foist her views, though she always offered her thoughts gently if asked.
Slowly, Victor felt the tension from his breakup with Molly melt away. With Victoria, pleasure crept back into ordinary thingswalks through London, late-night chats, her laughter at his jokes.
Half a year in, he knew he didnt want to wait. One evening, at their favourite café, Victor took out a small box, looked her in the eye, and said:
Id like you to be my wife.
Victoria froze for a second, then laughedpure, delightedand nodded.
Yes. Of course I will.
Their wedding was simplejust close friends and family. Victor and Victoria didnt care about what anyone else thought. The warmth they sharedmutual respect, trust, and the joy of being togetherwas more than enough.
