Confiscated
Your mother was absolutely atrocious! Not that I expected any better from her. Total country yokel.
Excuse me, what?! gasped Christine.
You heard me! declared her husband, Edward.
My mum is a hundred and fifty times better than your so-called refined lot! Bunch of arrogant, unprincipled snobs.
Well, off you go, then! Edward shouted, slamming the door for good measure.
Watch me! Ill go, dont you worry!
***
So, in summary, your mum single-handedly destroyed your young, hopeful family unit, sighed Imogen, Christines friend. Not even made it to the first anniversary.
She didnt destroy anything, it was all heading that way anyway, Christine uttered gloomily, stirring sugar through her tea with a sort of moody dedication. They were sitting in a café.
Nonsense! You were just telling me about your plans to have a baby! protested Imogen.
Divine intervention.
Wearing your mums face, was it? Imogen pressed on.
Oh for goodness sake! Christine snapped. Mums innocent. Dads car that was the last straw.
Three years ago, just a year before Christine got married, she lost her dad. Her mother, Olive Stanley, struggled terribly with the loss of her beloved husband, Paul, and even ended up in hospital. She was always in tears, remembering him and their happy years together, from their modest beginnings
Back in the day, Olive and Paul lived in a tiny village. Thats where they met. Later, they moved to London, got settled, and their employer gave them a nice little council flat. Some years later, Christine was born a late surprise, but wholly cherished.
They were a content little trio, rarely arguing. Christine grew up kind and bright. Pretty as a picture, and clever too.
Sadly, Christines grandmothers both passed away when she was young, and their little cottages in Devon were sold off. All ties with that happiness-soaked bit of countryside vanished.
It wasnt just her parents Christine herself adored those village summers, spent every year frolicking there. Her grandmothers ran their smallholdings with gusto and love, and made a tidy sum from it, too.
Christine was especially proud of them. And it was in that very village, elbow-deep in mud helping with a cow, that Christine decided shed become a vet.
Years later, Christine kept to that childhood vision and saw it through though, instead of treating cows, she mostly dealt with cats and dogs at an animal clinic.
Shed met Edward at work, when hed sashayed in with some outrageously expensive purebred for its shots. They hit it off immediately and started dating.
Conversation never ran dry; Christine would enthusiastically tell Edward about her village upbringing, stories about her parents, how they met, moved to the city, and generally formed an exemplary family unit.
Edward, in turn, would regale her with tales of his academic parents: a father lecturing at UCL and a mother doing mysterious research at the same university. Their family traditions and values were, apparently, the stuff of legend. Edward always felt a little superior to Christines folks although, to be fair, he tried very hard not to show it.
His upbringing made him look down his nose at country folk. It was his mum whod put these notions in his head. She was especially proud of having married a real Londoner and joining a respectable family. It was, shed claimed, the break of the century.
All the while, she herself was born in the countryside. But that, she furiously ignored and never mentioned.
Edward was besotted with Christine, and after only two months hed proposed. They moved into Edwards flat, which hed inherited from his paternal grandmother only the previous year. The building was a grand old thing from the fifties, in a well-to-do postcode, only in urgent need of serious TLC which the happy couple could not presently afford.
Edward, however, absolutely basked in the reflected glory of living among drippingly wealthy neighbours whod either combined or ravishly refurbished their flats into luxury pads with all the trimmings. The neighbours parked swish cars outside, offered polished hellos, and slipped away into their posh dens. The whole place just smells like money, Edward would sigh, rolling his eyes.
Christine, being blessedly normal, was unmoved by such things. She was more interested in the neighbours dogs. She judged people by their character, not by their house price on Rightmove.
Christines mum had mixed feelings about her future son-in-law. On the one hand, things seemed okay, but he struck Olive as suspiciously sweet, almost artificial. She suspected some deeper emotion lurked beneath that polished surface, and she fretted for her daughter.
Still, seeing the madly in-love look in Christines eyes, Olive kept quiet about her worries. Especially as they were based on nothing concrete. Thus, the wedding went ahead. A modest celebration Edwards family could squeeze a penny till it squealed, and fair play, they didnt once let go of old habits.
For a while, Edwards parents had had wild dreams of renting out that inherited flat for a small fortune but it was in dire need of repairs, plus, granny had been adamant, in words and in will, that the flat belonged to Edward, to live in with his wife. Instructions not to be broken, on pain of ghostly disapproval.
***
So whats this business with your late dads car? Still cant get my head around it, Imogen quizzed Christine.
Well, my folks had a car and a brick garage, Christine began, and when Dad passed away, I waived my right to inheritance so Mum could have it all. She could drive, sometimes used the car, but I cant drive at all, no point in my keeping it. Then, one day, Mum had a minor prang. Nothing serious, but she absolutely refused to drive again after that. Me, neither. Well, about six months after Edward and I married, Mum decided to give Edward power of attorney over the car. She hated seeing it just sitting there doing nothing, and she wasnt ready to sell it was almost new, a special model Dad had picked out just before he died
Christine sighed. The memory of her dad lingered.
Edwards got a licence? Imogen checked.
He does. No car, though. So he was over the moon at Mums offer, Christine said, grinning at the memory.
They went to the garage, Edward fizzed with excitement at the sight of the car, all oohs and aahs and a thousand thank-yous to Olive.
Mum only asked one thing, Christine added, going serious, that Edward help her get about take her to appointments, out shopping, weekly food run, that sort of thing. He promised faithfully.
Every Saturday, Olive liked to do the big shop at a specific supermarket. Shed ring Edward, and hed oblige and take her. Then she started redoing her flat it meant a few trips to B&Q to choose wallpaper, lino, and endless odds and ends.
One weekend, Olive needed to get to an old mates birthday at a restaurant, and asked Edward to pop her there and back. He refused claimed he had Very Important Affairs. Olive was quietly gutted; a black cab to that part of London costs the earth, and she had to shell out because she couldnt skip, nor face two hours on the tube in a ballgown.
A week later, same story. Edward was permanently busy. Olive postponed her GP visit trying to work around him it required a schlep across town to a specialist, and she couldnt avoid it forever.
Except, Edward was busy every time. Eventually, Olive discovered, quite by accident, that hed actually been driving his own parents everywhere.
Dad used to rent cars using car clubs, but managed to get blacklisted after some kerfuffle. Cant get access now, every club shares the same database, the lot. Lawyers told him to try court, but thatll take an age and, well, Ubers arent cheap, Edward explained to Olive. Mum needed me to shop for her, her big birthdays coming up, the house will be full of guests, so much to buy. And Dad needed running about too.
Hm, yes, was all that Olive could muster.
She was fuming. Apparently, for Edwards parents, taxis are too much, but she was expected to bankrupt herself. Clearly, the car had found a higher calling. To add insult, Christine told her Edward had chauffeured his mums cousin to Brighton, and helped friends transport an allotments worth of potatoes in the boot. Last shed heard, the car was in and out of the garage for sundry repairs, after a bit of a mishap.
***
So Mum decided to revoke the power of attorney. In short, she took the car away from Edward, Christine said to Imogen. She told him shed put it on Autotrader. Edward was mortally offended, and we had a big row. Honestly, Im on Mums side. His family were totally out of order. Lately, he was hardly at home, always running errands for them. Anyone with a pulse and a vague connection was getting a lift. Meanwhile, my Mum was ringing local cabs.
Thats pretty rotten. He gave his word! said Imogen.
Nobody ever asked my opinion Christine sulked on. Theyd just ring and tell him where to go and when. Whatever plans we had stuff em. I barely saw Edward at home.
Thats why you argued?
No, not really, Christine sighed. It was when Edward called my mum a country bumpkin. The marriage was doomed anyway. Edwards absolutely in thrall to his mother. Whatever she says goes. Hed ring her for every trivial decision, hours on the phone. Its unbearable. And honestly theyre both horrendous snobs.
***
Count your blessings you dumped penniless Christine, my boy, said Edwards mother, upon hearing of the bust-up. You can do so much better. Id kept out, thought youd see sense, but clearly you needed a nudge. Theres this lovely girl at the university Alice. Brainy, pretty, and from a proper family. Theyre descended from Lord knows who, the right connections its a super match.
Oh, Mum, Edward mumbled.
Oh, dont oh, Mum me! No backtracking now. And dont you dare even think about getting back with her. Let her patch up poodles. Its not our sort, my dear.
What, you meddled on purpose?! Edward suddenly realised.
Well um Look Im your mother, what do you expect? That match was slipping through your fingers! You marry Alice, full stop! File for divorce now, do you hear? Not a peep! I should never have listened to your father and given you independence. Look where it got us
***
There we are, thisll make your paw feel much better, Christine crooned to her fluffy patient at the clinic. At work, she was totally in her element, loving animals and her job with genuine passion. As for Edward shed just learned hed married a much younger girl second year at his parents university, no less.
Shes probably frightfully posh impeccable pedigree Christine mused, peeling off her white coat at closing time.
Suddenly, she had to laugh. All this talk of pedigree, ancestry It sounded suspiciously like the clients who paid a fortune for their show cats, as if blue blood was a cure for everything.
Oh, and Mums scrapped the car sale Christine told Imogen. Shes back behind the wheel herself. Said sorry for causing drama with Edward. I told her theres nothing to forgive it all happened for a reason.
I agree, Imogen said. With a mother-in-law like that, it was bound to go pear-shaped. The car chaos just sped things up.
As for married bliss, Edward found none with Alice. She and her family looked down on Edward and his folks, all barely concealing their disdain, as though they were doing the Stanleys a staggering favour by allowing the marriage.
A real misalliance, Alices mother would sigh, but what can you do, the heart wants what it wants
Edwards mother kept trying (and spectacularly failing) to curry favour with the new in-laws, whose opinion of her was slightly below that of damp toast.
Edwards father, meanwhile, simply continued with his beloved lecturing, letting the rest of them stew in their own social climbing melodrama. And, in all honesty, he may have been the only one thinking sensibly.
