“She’s Absolutely Impossible! – My Mate Winced – The Woman Was a Nightmare, I Don’t Even Want to Remember Her!” He’d Just Split Up With His Wife, and While He Swore He Didn’t Want to Think About Her, He Couldn’t Stop. He Told Me How She Argued Over Everything, Made Shopping Trips a Disaster, Was Hopeless at Getting Meals Ready, Blew Money on Rubbish Even Though She Earned Next to Nothing, and Got So Overweight It Drove Him Mad – Surely a Woman Must Keep Slim! He Said Things So Wild I Had to Ask Him to Tone It Down a Bit. “Easy for You to Judge, Mr. Perfect Gentleman!” He Snapped – “You Try Living With Her for a Week! I Managed Seven Years. We’re Lucky We Didn’t Have Kids – They’d Have Been Miserable.” “Alright, Mate, Just Calm Down,” I Said. But He Couldn’t: “You Can’t Imagine How She’d Harass Me With Phone Calls! If I Saw Friends, She’d Ring Every Five Minutes – ‘Are You Coming Home Yet?’ – Honestly, I Was Embarrassed.” “Yeah, That’s Grim,” I Agreed, “But At Least Now You’re Free…” Years Later, I Remembered That Conversation When Visiting Another Friend. “Let’s Take a Stroll in the Park With the Pram!” He Suggested. His Daughter Was Six Months Old, and He Loved Taking Her Out. As We Walked, He Quietly Told Me How Happy He Was. You Rarely Hear Such Simple, Honest Words These Days, So I Listened Closely – Especially Since There Was a Puzzle I Couldn’t Shake. He Talked About His Wife… They’d Been Together Over Two Years, Having First Met at a Party He’d Nearly Skipped. “If I Hadn’t Gone, I Wouldn’t Have Met Linda…” He Smiled. According to Him, Linda Was the Perfect Woman – Brilliant Cook, Wonderful Home-Maker, Savvy With Money (He’d Even Given Her a Duplicate Bank Card and Didn’t Bother Checking Statements). They Were Practically Inseparable: “If I’m Ever Without Her, After Just an Hour I Start Missing Her, So I Make My Excuses and Head Home. We Only Ever Argued Once, Over Our Daughter’s Name – She Wanted Antonia, I Wanted Rita. So We Went With Antonia, Like You Know. I Grumbled, But Realised – What For? It’s a Lovely Name. Linda Was Right.” He Added: “And She’s Got a Great Figure, Though She’s Always Saying She Needs to Slim Down.” “So, You’re Still Completely Smitten Even After All This Time?” I Asked. “Of Course! I Love Her More Every Single Day!” Such Different Wives for Two Friends… But The Twist Is – They’re the Same Woman. Linda Was Once the Wife Despised by One Friend, and Is Now the Wife Adored by Another. And Like That, I’m Left Wondering: How Can That Possibly Happen?

Shes absolutely unbearable! my friend scowled A dreadful woman. I dont even want to think about her!
Hed only just got divorced, and though he insisted he didnt want to dwell on it, he just couldnt help himself. He went on about how she would argue over absolutely everything, how stepping outside with her was a risk because shed invariably cause a scene at the shops; how she could never have dinner ready when he was starving; how shed fritter away money on nonsense even though she barely earned anything; and how shed put on weight, which drove him mad he said a woman ought to stay slender!
He started using words I found a bit much, so I gently asked him to tone it down.
You think its easy to lecture me, dont you, proper English gent?! he snapped, Try living with her for a week. I put up with seven years! Its a blessing we never had children. Poor kids wouldve been miserable.
Come on, calm down, I told him.
But he wouldnt have it. Youve no idea how she used to harass me with phone calls! If I went to see mates, my phone would be buzzing every five minutes: When are you coming home? Honestly, I felt embarrassed.
Yeah, thats rough, I said, But at least youre free now
That little exchange popped into my mind about three years later when I visited another friend for the weekend.
He suggested, Lets take a walk in the park with the pram.
His daughter was six months old, and he took such delight in those strolls.
As we wandered, his little one asleep, he quietly confided how content he was. These days, its rare to hear those simple, genuine admissions of happiness, so I listened intently. All the more so since there was a curious twist that kept nagging at me.
He spoke glowingly of his wife Theyd been together over two years now, first meeting at some massive party hed actually wanted to skip.
And now I shudder to think, he chuckled, Had I stayed home, I would never have met Claire
Claire she was, according to him, the perfect wife. She cooked brilliantly, kept the house immaculate so that even a humble mug brought him joy; she was prudent with money, hed handed her a second bank card and didnt even bother checking the statements.
They were inseparable. You know, he confided, if Im anywhere without her, just an hour goes by and Im already missing her. I make excuses and hurry home. Weve only ever argued once, about our daughters name. Claire wanted Ellie, I wanted Sophie. Well, as you know, shes Ellie now. I grumbled a bit, but looking back what was the point? Its a lovely name. Claire was right.
Then he added, And shes got a fantastic figure, even though shes forever muttering that she needs to lose weight.
So youre honestly still in love, even after all this time? I asked.
Completely! I love her more every day
Such contrasting wives my two friends had The twist, though, is that theyre the same woman. Claire was the wife who drove my first mate to despair and divorce, and now shes adored by the second, her new husband.
Im left wondering how it could be how can one person inspire such polar feelings in two men?
Its a puzzle I have yet to solve.